WTF
by Bells-n-Akira
Summary: Two girls are sent to the world of Naruto, but not everything goes as planned. In the bodies of Ino and Sakura, they try to act normal, but people go past suspicion and into thinking they are officially insane? How will people bear it? How will they!
1. Prologue

_**Disclamer**__**: I may not own Naruto now, but one day he will be mine (grins evilly)**_

_**P.S.**__** if you have a problem with my writing, then don't read it!**_

_**Prologue**_

"Ugh," I moaned, "Talk about a killer headache. I feel like I have a week of hangovers all at once." I complained to myself until I felt oddly long bangs clinging to my face. "What the-," I looked in the mirror to see a super long-haired blond with blue eyes staring straight at me. This didn't last long for long, as the mirror soon hit my face and the world went black.

--Cate's POV--

I felt the sun hitting my eyelids and I turned over, only to collapse on the hard floor, "Damn, when did my bed get so small," I muttered and looked to see a clean, normal room with an odd fire robe hanging by the entrance. "What- no, WHO THE HELL THINKS IT'S DAMN FUNNY TO WAKE UP IN SOME BITCHES ROOM?!?!" I might have over reacted just a little. I got off of the ground and saw something pink fall in front of my face. Habit took over and I grabbed it to throw it away, only to realize I had tugged my hair. "What in the," I tugged it again, "How in the," tug, "Why in the..." I froze to collect my thoughts.

"_Oooook, it is PINK and it's MY hair. Think rationally. That is impossible... unless I am Sakura, from Naruto," _I snickered at the thought. I looked for a mirror just to see huge green EMERALDS staring straight back at me through the mirror.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!" Oh man, I'm offically insane. I got up ran around staring at the pink thing in the mirror, my hair.

"Sakura, Sakura! Are you alright?" Asked the kind voice of a woman asked from behind me.

I turned to see a woman with shoulder length, chocolate brown hair. Must be her mom...

--Akira's POV--

I opened my eyes to notice I was drooling on the mirror in a uncomfortable position, and, oh yeah, did I mention I'm in someone else's body still?

"Oh, Kami-sama is that Ino?" I pointed at the mirror, confusedly, "I mean, come on look at my hair. She's. I'm. A. Bl-blo-u-nde," I whimpered.

"Ino! It's time to go to the academy!! So get up! NOW!!!" Someone called from down stairs.

"I'll be down in a minute!" I looked in the mirror and smirked, "Right after I do something about my hair," I mumbled. "Hey where da' scizzors of 'dis' house?!" I yelled downstairs.

"What the fuck are you bitching about!!!" Wow, Ino mom got anger issues... Poor flowers in the shop, "Get your ass down here now!" Ah, there's the bathroom (at this point I'm completly ignoring her. hehehehe.)

(snipping and dyeing sound are heard from the bathroom.) "Yes! It is alive!!! Mwahahaha MWAHAHAHAHA!MWAAHAAHAAHA-" Interupted, of course.

"Shut the hell up and go to the academy!!!" Academy! Sports and outdoors! The right stuff the right price! Academy!

I looked around and found a black yukata and slacks with detachable sleeves that start right above the elbows (talk about luck, I'd hate to have to wear her slutty outfit.)

--10 minutes later, Cate's POV--

"Eh."I searched the room for something to wear, as that pink thing that Sakura has doesn't cut it.

(while later)

"Finally!"I had found black pants, and a white cotton tee-shirt. I walked outside barefoot and headed down the road when I saw...

"GASP! It's YOU!"

"DOUBLE GASP!! IT"S YOU!" Yes, we actually said gasp.

"C-cate is this my dream or yours?" Akira asked.

"Tch, like I would know," I answered the obvious. "Well what're you waiting for? Punch yourself and find out already!"


	2. NO! I DON'T WANT TO CATCH THE EMO!

**Disclaimer**: Dude, we like don't own Naruto... Duh...

Shout out to all our super cool reviewers, you know who you are! ;D So, like here's the next chapter!

Recap:

_"Tch, like I would know," I answered the obvious."Well watcha waiting for? Punch yourself and find out already!"_

Akira POV

"No, you do it." She hit me. "Ouch, what the flip? What was that for?"

"What was what for?" Cate said, feigning innocence.

"You just hit me!"

"Oh, that, well, you told me to!" She said, looking away as if for an excuse.

"No, I told you to punch yourself." I hissed.

"Hey, do you know how to get to the academy?" She asked.

"Um, let me think." I said, then concentrated, completly forgetting about our squabble.

"It's that way." Cate said, pointing. I stared at her. "What?"

"You DO know everything, Cate." She rolled her eyes and pointed at a sign behind me that showed a map of Konoha. "Oh..."

"Hey, we've gotta keep a low profile and refer to each other as Ino and Sakura, so that they don't get suspicious."

"Okay... Forehead."

"Shut up piggy."

-AT THE ACADEMY-

Sasuke POV

I was sitting there ignoring everyone, alert to sounds of those particular fangirls, prepared to dodge. I heard the door slam open, and inwardly cringed. However, instead of the usual squeals,there were complaints of flatness.

"This blows royally. I'm... FLAT AS THE DESK I STAND ON!" I looked up and saw Sakura standing on my desk. Ino cleared her throat.

"Ahem, Sakura... You're standing on Emo Kid's desk..." Sakura screamed and jumped into Ino's arms.

"AHH! I'M GONNA CATCH THE EMO!" She said dramatically, putting a hand to her forehead as if she were about to faint. She took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm better now."

Ino sighed.

"We'll boil the Emoness off you after school."

"AFTER SCHOOL?"

"Yes, you can handle it that long." Ino dropped Sakura, and as Sakura fell, she reached out and dragged a hand across my desk, then slapped Ino's leg.

"HAH! NOW I'M NOT THE ONLY INFECTED ONE! Being overdramatic is such fun. I'M GONNA CATCH THE EMO!" Sakura started falling over.

Akira POV

I looked at my leg in horror. "NOOOO! I can't catch the EMO! I'm too young to visit my Emo corner and kill myself!" I yelled/complained as I ran around the room.

"Yamanaka Ino, why are you disrupting my class?" I turned just in time to see the sensei guy yell, obviously trying to keep his temper. Sheesh, some people really need to get a sense of humor...

"Gomen-nasai..." I went to Cate's side and whispered, "What's 'Mr. I don't have a life so I'm gonna take it out on you's name?" She sighed, of course. This is how it usually is, well in the real world anyway.

"I'm sooooo sorry for the way Ino-pig's acting today, Iruka-sensei. I don't know whats come over her." She said in that stupid 'I'm so innocent I couldn't hurt a fly' voice as she dragged me to a seat. She shot me the 'glance' (A.K.A. it means baka).

"Don't take the blame, Ms. Haruno. I know you try your hardest to keep the class straight," BS!, "But Yamanaka will have to take responsibility and SEE ME AFTER CLASS!" ...damn, this is my first day here and I'm already messing up... Dammit... My 'mom' is sooo gonna cuss me out.

Class started, and I zoned out until the teacher (forgot his name again... did Cate say Enuka?) called on me, "Ms. Yamanaka, could you please answer this for me?" He said as he pointed at the chalk board. Oooooooooh craaaaaaaap! I can't read japanese! I am soooooo doomed.

"T-the answer is... um" all of a sudden some kind of voodoo magic came over me and I blurted out, "There is no solution to that problem, it is a constant loop." Wow, go me. I know things that I didn't even know I could know. Now if only I knew the question he asked me...

Cate POV

"T-the answer is... um...there is no solution to that problem, it is a constant loop." 'Ino-pig' answered as though, at first, she was stumped. How in the world could she answer a question in JAPANESE that she typically wasn't even paying attention to? I don't even know what the question was! Man, first the Emoness and now this... Major suckage...

"DIIIING" The bell (might I add, the annoyingly loud bell) rang and made Akira fall out of her chair. Hah! That was humerous. If only I could rewind time and watch that over again!

Luckily, Iruka was to busy jotting something else on the board. Unluckily, though, the WHOLE CLASS saw it and burst out laughing. Except for Emo, (Sasuke) and Lazy-ass, (Shikamaru, he's still sleeping) of course.

"SILENCE!" Iruka yelled, pratically blowing my ears off. At this point, though, a dude rushed and started to whisper something in Iruka's ear. They looked at each other as if conversing telepathically and Iruka said, "Class, I will return shortly." Then he ran off with the dude. Huh, I wonder what's happening. Maybe something bad has happened like... ooooh nooo. This is bad.

I shot Akira a look and she glanced back at me cluelessly, of course. Man, I really don't want to explain to her AGAIN. But who can guess what happened? Yep, you got it.

"Sakura Haruno and Ino Yamanaka, please come with me." That dude said as he poked his head through the door. Oh, I am soooo blaming Akira. If she had kept to the plan this wouldn't happen!

"I am blaming you FOREHEAD-GIRL." Akira hissed at me as we walked to the door. Wait a minute, what? My fault?

"ME, you're the one who went psycho and ran around the room as though Oro-teme were chasing after you!" I growled back at her. We both stopped in our tracks and glared at each other.

"Oh yeah! Wel-" she was cut off. Ha, priceless!

"Girls, hurry, now's not the time." The dude said in a tone that couldn't possibly be more obviously irritated unless he had a sign that said 'I am irritated' hanging over his head.

"God, impatient enough?" Akira mumbled as we resumed our slooooow pace. Ha, I agree totally, 'Kira-san!

"WAIT!"

Chapter One End

OOOOOOh cliff hanga. What's gonna happen next? Will they be fond out? Who knows...

Sakura: I know who it is!

Me: Sakura!

Ino:Me TOO!

Me: INO?

Both of Them: It is-

Me: WTF!

Still Both: Hey, why did you scream the name or yor story out?

I start banging my head in the wall repeating: Why me?


	3. Who took what!

Yo, peoples, what it do? Dis be da next chapta of da story, yo

**DISCLAIMER:**** We be not owning Duh**

Kay...ummm... Oh yeah! Sorry that I accidently spelled Iruka with a 'E' instead of a 'I' (Bells chewed me out MAJORLY for... so she decided to write this on her own... but I did help her, I just couldn't type)

It is only Cate's POV (couse bells wrote it) Oh! Thanks for the reviews, and for reminding us about Inner- Sakura. Hope you like our somewhat torture of Sasuke's pride!

Bella- Hey, dolls. Just wanted ya'll to know. I re-edited chapters 1&2, and I'm editing this as I type these words heh heh. The reason is I was bored and wanted to change some things. So I am. If you are a veteran reader, then I apologize for the changes you don't like, and I'm glad you like the changes if you do. If you are a new reader, however, then pretend I said nothing. Enjoy the story! teh heh...

_recap:_

_"WAIT!"_

Kira-san and I spun on the spot. I sighed. _What now? _I thought.

"What now?" Kira whispered to me. I rolled my eyes.

"WAIT! IRUKA-SAN! JUST A MOMENT!" I looked at the dude who was some guy whose name I just forgot.

"What's that dude's name?" Kira asked me quietly. I rolled my eyes. Of course.

"What is it, Hayate-san?" Iruka said. Oh, so that's his name.

"Iruka-san, you have the wrong two! They weren't the ones who... hack, hack cough..." Geez, is he okay? Wait, what we evidently not do? Mob Sasuke? I started laughing. They just looked at me, until Kira cracked up as well. "As I was saying, they aren't the ones who," I hit Kira, and we listened to find out what happened, "cough,cough,"

Suddenly, an appearance was made by inner me.

**WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED? TELL ME! **I was shocked to say the least, but kept listening.

"Broke into Sasuke's house last night and stole his underwear." Kira fell over anime-style. I helped Kira stand, and we shouted at the same time,

"What the hell?" Everyone looked at us, and I explained.

"Why would you think we did that? If he is such the great ninja, then he'd catch us sneaking through the house. Even if he isn't, enamored fangirls, as well as A... Ino and I, would not be a very quiet persons, yes?" Fangirl flunkie 1 piped up at that moment.

"Sakura-san, you broke in the other day." I smacked my forehead, finding it to be just the right size for such an action.

"Geez, this thing IS good for something... Kishimoto-san isn't a total jerk after all."

"Who's Kishimoto-san?" Akira asked. I sighed.

"Masashi Kishimoto is the guy who... nevermind, not important."

3.

2.

1.

", PLEASE!" Heaven help me. I took a breath and began to explain.

"You see,-"

"ANYWAY, it wasn't them, it was... hack, hack, gasp," Here, he fell down and croaked, as in kicked the bucket. KIDDING KIDDING, don't pelt me with stuff. "Keiko Murakami." The fangirls squealed, and she pulled out a pair of clearly Uchiha boxers.

"ARGH! I SO TOTALLY DID NOT NEED TO SEE THAT! AW, MAN, MY NIGHT IS RUINED!" I screeched.

**I TOTALLY AGREE! THAT IS ****THE**** NASTY!**

"Are you okay? You seem... different." Said Fangirl Flunkie 1. Akira elbowed me.

"You gotta stay somewhat in character, duh." She hissed. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh my. Sasuke's boxers," I said in a complete monotone, "this is the highlight of my life." Akira fell down laughing, and everyone else was staring at me. I twirled my fingers in circles by my ears in the 'I could care less, this is fake enthusiasm.' signal. "Oh, if only he was in- okay, I gotta stop now, I'm getting sick." I finished, and Kira fell down the stairs in the aisle. I hope she's in pain.

"I'm okay." She called from her spot at the bottom of the stairs, giggling madly. I smacked my giant forehead again.

"Baka."

Kay the boxers (Sasukes) are navy blue, of course, and have the Uchiha symbol on the side. I know, you're probaly thinkin' "Yuk! Sasuke in the boxers is disgusting" (me and Bells are). But you can imagine Itachi in them and it would be HOT. He still mine though... :)

Cate:End of Chapter!

Akira:...already?

Cate:Yes.

Chibi Itachi Does Puppy Eyes.

Chibi Itachi:Weview,pwease...

Akira Melts In Background.


	4. DOT DOT DOT

yo, my freakidelic reader, this be da nex chappie.

**DISCLAIMER:Pardone moi francias,but...no**

**O,by the by,Kikyouhater118,what's confusing?Kira's going nutzo**

**I am NOT going nuts... I just want to know what is so confusing... and I (or Bells) will explain whatever it isK?**

_recap:_

_"Baka."_

I shook my head, and sat down, resting my head in my hands. "This is completely stupid. I... I don't even know what to say. I am speechless. Well, obviously not literally, or else why do I keep babbling? This is firmly against my apathetic hermit principles." I mumbled to myself. Kira walked up and sat on the desk.

"I'm BORED! DO SOMETHING INTERESTING!... WHERE'S MY BOOK?... SASUKE, GET UP AND DO THE CHICKEN DANCE. "She whined. I looked at him and smirked.

"Actually, that sounds like something to see, do it, Uchiha." He didn't even look up. I 'Hn'ed (no,seriously) and looked at Naruto. "Uzumaki, you'll dance, right?"

"Sorry, Sakura-chan, but... What's the chicken dance?" Kira and I looked at each other, and she grinned.

"Let's dance." She stood on the desk, and started doing the chicken dance. I sat there, wondering what the hell she thought she was doing. I closed my eyes, and Iruka walked back in, and told us to shut the hell up, or we'd be decapitated with toothbrushes. Actually, he told us to please be quiet, but the way I said it made me laugh. I know, I know, I'm a sick, twisted little person and my soul will burn in hell for eternity... Whatever...

"All right, tomorrow is the graduation exams, so study hard and don't play hooky, NARUTO!" He said. I scoffed.

"As if Uzumaki's the only one." I whispered to Kira.

"The only one that gets caught." She whispered back. We snickered quietly, then Iruka dismissed us for the day. Akira and I walked side by side back to our houses, and as usual for me, I went upstairs to my room. Also as usual for me, I dropped my stuff on the floor and went back downstairs to hang with Kira. According to her, Ino's mom is a bitch, so I was gonna do what I do best, which is make Kira's family like me better. Just kidding, I was going to help with the flower shop. Akira, apparently, knows nothing about flowers, and I do, which is strange, because she's supposed to be Ino, but not that strange, because my new name means 'cherry blossom'. At least, I know about what dudes need to give their girlfriends when they screw it up...

Kira POV!

"Hey... what's this flower?" I looked up and saw some guy asking Cate another question, and she grinned evilly.

"Why? What's it for?" She asked, hiding it.

"M-My girlfriend's birthday is coming up soon,and..." He stuttered. I cursed Cate and her fun-hogging ways.

"It's a Sunagakure death rose." I said. "I wouldn't get that for her, if you want to sleep with her and not the dust mites." I mentally cheered. Take that, Cate! HAHA!

"Get her something she likes, but no roses. They are so over done." Cate said, after staring at me for a few moments. "What you'll wanna get is something that means something to her. Who's your girlfriend, anyway?"

"Violet?" He said, so scared that it came out as a question. I snickered.

"Get her a daffodil." I suggested. "No, better yet, a carnation. Any special occasions coming up?"

"Her birthday's next Saturday..." Cate glared at him.

"Get her a carnation and a birthday card, and sing happy birthday to her when the two of you are all alone, then take her out on the town, and let her pick where you eat." She closed her eyes and leaned on the counter. "Money saving is advised. There is a festival. You could take her to that." She looked back up at him, and he flinched. "Shall we ring it up for you?" I picked up on her hint, and glared at him as well.

"Or, is there something else you need help with?" He stumbled backwards, then gulped.

"R-Ring it up, p-please." Cate gathered the flowers and card, and I rang him up. He paid, and ran out of the store.

"YAMANAKA INO! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE RIGHT NOW!" I frowned, and went to her. Ooh, she's pretty.

"Yes, mom?" I asked as innocently as possible.

"Did you just run a customer off?"

"No, I actually sold two carnations and a card. Why?"

"Let me rephrase that, why the hell were you rude to our customer? Do you not realize that your fucking life depends on money, and you get money from working, no... you get money from those customers! So, if you have no customers, then you don't have money! Dammit, can't you do anything right?" God, I feel kind of sorry for Ino, her whole life she had to live with this high blood-pressured person...

"Gomen nasai, Okaa-san, I will try to do my best at minding my manners to the customers." I said in the politest tone possible. I practically heard Cate staring at me in disbelief, and then she hid behind the corner and was trying her best not to laugh. I inwardly sighed, I'm trying to ease my way out of this situation, but she's making it dificult.

"Excellent, now I'll watch the shop while you practice your manners," SCORE!, "I expect to see a great improvement," dammit... I could feel all my joy just crumbling. "Now go," I sulked outside and looked back expectantly at Cate.

"Hah, you soo got your ass busted," she grinned at me.

"Shut the hell up, Cate. Anyway, I don't know about you, but I'm gonna go train, I will sooo NOT fail the chuunin exams." I said walking in a random direction that led to who knows what.

"Kay , two problems," she paused, "One, you don't even know WHERE the training grounds are, and two, why the hell do you think you can beat me, if after all we do fight each other? What makes you think I won't beat you?"

Cate POV

I stared at her,and she blinked at me.

"Um...That's not the point." It was her 'I don't wanna answer that' excuse. I shook my head.

"Well, we need to go train. Or, um...we could just go hang out at my place." I suggested hopefully.

"No, we need to go train and be strong. Or are you resigned to the fact that I'm stronger than you?" I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, I'm out." I waltzed out of the shop. I could practically hear her rage bubbling at me. "Oh, Hydrogen, Helium, lithium, berrylium, boron, carbon, nitrogen, oxygen... What's after oxygen? Dammit..." I trailed off. "Ah, Florine..."

Later that same day

"Blah, blah, blah... blah." I said, muttering to myself as Kira exploded at some kid for asking her what time it was.

"JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM? A WATCH? GET ONE, YOU STUPID FREAK!" She screamed. I sighed and sat behind the tree.

**CHA! WHAT THE FUCK'S GOING ON? YOU AIN'T SAKURA!**

I jumped.

"What the hell?" I said quietly.

_Okay, what was that?_

**THAT WAS ME! INNER SAKURA, BITCH!**

_WHAT? WHO YOU CALLING BITCH, BITCH?_

**I'M CALLING YOU BITCH, BITCH! CHA!**

I punched myself in the forehead, hard, then turned to the tree, and started thunking my head against it. I fell backward, and almost hit the ground. However, someone caught me.

**UM, SORRY, BUT I NEED SOME THOUGHTS FROM YOU GUYS, MY LOVING READERS... SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO UPDATE, BUT BELLS IS HAVING HEADACHES. (THE PLOT BUNNIES ARE OUT TO GET HER!)RIGHT NOW, SHE'S LYING DOWN WITH HER FEET UP. WE NEED YOU TO TELL US WHO YOU THINK CATE SHOULD END UP WITH. DON'T YOU DARE SAY SASUKE, OR BELLS WILL STAB YOU WITH FROZEN RAISENS AND NEVER TALK TO YA'LL AGAIN. (SURRIOUSLY, I AINT KIDDING)**

**READ AND REVIEW!**


	5. Free of Pain

Sorry it's ridiculously late, but, you can blame school.

**Disclaimer: You'll know when/if we own Naruto (Sasuke will die a painful and an excruciating long death)!**

**Enjoy le chappie!**

_Recap:_

_'However, someone caught me.'_

"Sakura-chan... are you okay?" I kept my eyes firmly shut.

'_Chan… What the Hell?' _I thought, then replied, "I most certainly am not. I am being touched my someone who probably doesn't have permission for such a thing." I frowned and opened my eyes. "And you are... Kiba?" He frowned at me. "Sorry, dog boy. I'm not good with names." He raised one eyebrow.

"Dog boy? You're one to talk…Cherry blossom." I rolled my eyes.

"Ooh, cherry blossom. Like I've never heard that one before." I sat up. "Whoo... head rush..." His eyebrow some how managed to rise even higher, and, of course his mouth didn't want to miss out on the fun, so it gave a smirk. I glared at him "What're you smirking at," I paused. Then decided to tease him. "_Doggy-boy." _He frowned.

"You just bang your head against a tree, then fell and now you act as though not of it happened," He thought for a moment, "Not only that, but you've been acting different lately… are you okay?"

'_CRAP! Quick think!'_

**Ha! That's what you get for invading MY body!**

'_Your not helping!'_

**Tch, why would I want to help you?**

'_If I get caught YOU get caught!'_

**Oh…..Damn…Ummm….**

Before we could come up with any thing, Kira intruded. "FOREHEAD GIRL! Sorry to intrude in your lover's spat," I tried to deny it but she continued before I could, "But don't we need to go train," She glared at me then turned to Kiba with a kind look, "Kiba, would you so kind as to let go of her so we may continue," He shrugged then helped me straight on my feet, "Thank you, now goodbye." Then he started.

"Bu-" She glared at him and snapped.

"Good. Bye." Kiba raised his hand and slowly walked away backwards, and we walked on towards the training grounds.

**Man, this girl is a bitch on a rampage. **I smirked at her words.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" She whispered once we were far out of earshot. "It's bad enough that we have completely different personalities than Sakura and Ino, but now your going around with every guy possible."

"Well, It's not my fault," I stated defensively, "An annoying voice," **Hey!, **"Inside my head called me a bitch so I tried to beat her up-" She stopped and looked at me

"Wait…. What?….." I took the time to notice we were at the training grounds, "So does that mean you have an inner-Sakura?" I shrugged, "And you tried to beat her up?… What are you, an idiot?" I glared at her.

"Oh yeah? What would _you_ do?"

…

I raised an eyebrow, "I thought so." She sighed.

"Well, from now on just ignore it. 'Kay?" I inwardly sighed as I realized she was right then I nodded, "Alright, now, we should warm-up first."

"Right."

2hrs Later, Kira's POV

I knew that Cate was in boot-camp before we ended up here, and I took karate and judo (A/N the origin of self-defense class and it's way more advanced), but I expected at least a bit of a challenge.

"Cate, I'm booored! Can we _please_ do something besides taijutsu?" I gave her a pleading look. She sighed in aggravation.

"I've told you before, we need to work on each thing so we can be more powerful. We started with the easiest, taijutsu, then we'll work on genjutsu and ninjutsu."

"But I want to learn to control my chakra, I can learn all that crap later. I want walk on walls and water _now_." She thought this over, a glint in her eye.

"Fine, I guess we can start trying to walk up trees, if you really want to," she claimed, but I knew she wished for the abilities, as well.

"Thank you!" Even though I knew that fact, I decided not to wound her pride. I started focusing my chakra in my feet. I felt the chakra enter my feet and I started toward the tree…. Only to fall flat on my face.

"Hehehehe….." She held her stomach and covered her mouth trying not to let out the giggles. I rolled over on my back, sat up, and blinked.

'_Man that didn't hurt at all,'_ I thought. In the corner of my eye I noticed Cate regain her composure. She concentrated and took off heading for a tree…. I guess she wanted to join me, for she fell as well.

"Ugh," she sat up, and I stared at her. I started laughing quietly as I saw the dirt on her nose. My little laugh became a full-hearted one as she sneezed as though she were a dog and the dirt spread. I tried to stand up and walk over to her to help get rid of it (while laughing) but the unshed tears in my eyes blurred my vision and it didn't help as it started to sprinkling. In other words, once I was near her, yet again I fell on my face. Though at this point I was so drunk on laughter that it only made it louder. I laid back and felt the rain enter my mouth and land on my body. She joined me as the rain seemed to come down faster.

After a while we ran out of breath and just relaxed and let the rain wash away are sweat. "Man, I'm such a klutz," I mumbled as my eyes closed. Cate seemed to say something, but I didn't care. All I knew was the cold yet comforting blankets of rain.

?hrs Later

"_How… how is this possible?" I looked down at Orochimaru's dying form and smirked._

"_That's simple, you're weak and I'm strong," I said as I raised my sword for the finishing blow._

"_No, you can't kill my lord!" Kabuto said as he covered his body. Suddenly an image of Pocahontas covering and saving John Smith's life entered my head, and my smirked grew into a grin at the thought._

'_Sorry, but not this time Pocahontas'__ I thought as I lowered my blade into Kabuto's heart. He screamed, and I removed my blade and threw him out of the way. "Now, it's your turn, you bastard!" __'Finally….'__ The unspoken word seemed to echo throughout the room. I lifted my blade once more, but right before I could strike, everything was drowned into darkness. _I heard voices, but they were more like screeches of the dead. One of them in particular.

"Please, Kira... wake up!" I opened my eyes drowsily and saw Cate's face, but what was weird was that she was crying. "You're alive," she said as she hugged me, very tightly.

"What's wrong?" I asked, confused.

"Sakura, if she is alive then take her to the hospital! We'll deal with them!" Another voice called. I sat up to see who, but I felt something wet on my right arm. I looked at it and noticed it was covered in blood, as was my stomach. My nose wrinkled.

"Hey, who's blood am I covered in?" I asked Cate, and she gave me a worried look.

"Y-you're joking, right?" I gave her a blank look and slowly shook my head. "That's _your_ blood." I looked at my arm once more, searching for a wound and noticed it wasn't just one wound, but at least five.

"How?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper as I saw the huge gash in my stomach._'Why?...Why can't I feel any of the pain?'_ She looked over toward something. I turned my head in the direction she was looking and noticed a fight going on.

"The leaf shinobi are fighting them now, but their losing," I admit it, I was confused. I didn't remember anyone attacking the village before the gennin teams were chosen. Out of pure curiosity I looked to see who it was and froze.

"Akatsuki."

End

**Okay, to everyone that reads this story: Bells has moved (the main reason this was delayed), but before she left, she wrote a letter to you all!**

**my dear readers, **

**I am afraid that I am moving away from ms akira, and of course, you, my readers. **

**I wish to apologize to you, as I can only imagine the effect this must have on you. you see, as WTF is half my story, my impending move will surely affect it's progress. now, since I have had done with the formalities...**

**signed,**

**Isabella Fujikari**

**Oh, and I will take over the story (Akira Saiden). Up until now, Bells has done all the writing, but this chapter is by me (as will the rest of them), so if anything is wrong, please tell me. I only hope I can live up to all of your expectations.**

**Read and Review, please!**


	6. Are you effing CEREAL!

Ok!

Disclaimer- If I said that I owned Naruto, I'd be lying. However, if I told you that Cate didn't totally pwn Sakura... I'd still be lying. I'm no liar.

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_"Akatsuki"_

I stood up, and wobbled a little.

"Whoa, head rush." I looked around, and saw that in addition to Cate, Uchiha, Uzumaki, and Kakashi were all gathered around me. Cate turned to Kakashi.

"Honestly, who do you think I am? If she was in enough danger that she needed to go to the hospital, then I would have taken her. I'm very used to this." She told him, and sniffed. He smiled condescendingly.

"Sure, sure." I looked around again.

"Who's Akatsuki, and who's fighting him?" Cate rolled her eyes, and opened her mouth to explain, but shut up. She had realized my point.

"From what we picked up, they are some secret organization, and they have come for a pair of demons that they apparently pulled in from another dimension." Kakashi said. Naruto stood up and grabbed my arms, preventing me from moving.

"What the--?" Sasuke slid his arms around Cate, holding her just as still.

"What the bloody hell, Uchiha?" She growled. Kakashi stood up.

"Who are you two?" He asked. My heart stopped. What now? They'll kill us if they find out!

"Bloody hell! Is that it? I'll tell you, since you're the good guy. Of course," She looked at him squarely in the eye. "I'm gonna need you to call off Uchiha here."

"Only if I like your answer." He countered. She smirked.

"Deal. Okay. I'm not Sakura Haruno, and that girl there is not Ino Yamanaka." She began. "We just woke up here one morning, yesterday, I believe, and now here we are, held up over a stupid matter that could be settled at any time, really, provided that you ask politely. My name is Catherine Fuji. That is Akira Saiden. We, from the start, have been raised in an enironment much like this one. I think that's it." I snickered.

"Except that Catie is in love with--" She somehow kicked her shoe off and it hit me in the face.

"I am not, Saiden, and you know it." She said.

"Not what?" Naruto asked.

"Nothing important." She said, scratching her leg with her foot. I snorted.

"Right." She growled at me, and I hissed at her.

"Humph! Anyway, Kakashi-san. Can we go free now?" He thought for a moment.

"Fine." I took in a huge breath, and Cate went straight to her knees and started sketching in the dirt. She did that for a while, and then stood up, erasing her doodle absentmindedly.

"Oh, I almost forgot." She walked over and punched me in the stomach.

"Oof!" She smiled sadistically.

"Don't call me 'Catie'." She snapped. She helped me stand up. "No hard feelings, ne, Saiden?" I smirked back at her.

"Nah." We shook hands.

Cate POV

I could see the shock on Uchiha's face, but paid no attention.

"Anyway, wasn't something... oh, yes. How did the fight with the Akatsuki agent go?"

"God only knows."

"Shall we find out?" Saiden asked.

"Let's." We walked away to where the action had been, but the battle was over. There was no enemy ninja in sight. "Hey, you dude. What happened?" She called. He looked at me.

"W-we managed to drive him off. But, he said he'd be back soon f-for... hack, hack, cough..." This time, Hayate Gecko died for real.

"Holy shizzle..." Kira murmured.

"Seriously?" I asked nervously.

"N-no... ladies, I'm not dead... I just passed out from pain... and possibly blood loss." Oh.

"Thank Goddess you're not dead!" I said, and then lifted him up and attempted to roll him over, bu found I couldn't. I straightened and looked at my companion.

"What?"

"Saiden!" I sighed, and she finally got it.

"Oh, right." She hurried over and flipped him over. I took his vest off of him and searched him quickly.

"Okay, it appears that it's nothing too bad. He just needs some rest." I looked around and took my coat off and laid it on the round, then folded it into a pillow. I tucked it under his head. He immediately dropped off to sleep, and I fell backwards exhaustedly. Kakashi walked up then.

"What happened to Gecko-san?"

"He passed out from exhaustion. What concerns me is that he's not bleeding, which is odd, considering that fights like that almost always end bloodily." I told him, and he nodded, before carrying Hayate to the hospital. Naruto and Sasuke stood and waited for him to leave.

"Okay, now that he's gone..." Naruto crouched beside me, and I looked over at him from my position on the ground. "Are you really not Sakura-Chan?" I smiled.

"Do you really think Sakura could be as cool as me?" I asked him, and then sat up. "Listen, Uzumaki, I know that you really care for her, but she only sees you as an annoyance." I ruffled his hair.

"W-well... what about you?"

"I see you more as my little brother than as a potential boyfriend. Sorry, Uzumaki." I stood up and dusted myself off. "Well, that's that, I suppose." I tossed my hair, and sighed. "Something weird is happening."

"Um, Sa... Cate-Chan..."

"What up, Uzumaki?" He blushed.

"Y-you're... um..." He whispered it in my ear, and I flushed like Hinata.

"F-for real?" I asked him. He nodded. I straightened. "Hell yeah!"

"I'm hungry." Kira complained.

"Uzumaki, would you be as kind as to take Akira-Chan for some ramen?" He nodded, and they ran off together for Ichiraku. I laughed softly. "How childish." I turned and walked away, off to Sakura's place.

"Where're you going?" I turned.

"Sakura's place. Why?"

"Maybe I should go with you to make sure you aren't secretly informing to Akatsuki." I looked at him.

"If you say so, Uchiha." We walked to her house.

"What village are you really from?" He asked.

"I'm not from a village, I'm from a... Well, actually, you could call it Navy Village."

"Navy?"

"The water-based protection force for my country."

"I see." I turned to ask him a question of my own, but he wasn't there.

"Damn ninjas, leaving in the middle of the goddamn conversation." I grumbled. I walked up the stairs. "I'm home, mom! Give me a minute to change and I'll be right down." I called.

I got to my room and pulled my clothes off, and draped them over the back of the desk chair. I searched the room again, and found a dark blue tee-shirt, white shorts, and some black hair dye. I padded down the hall, dyed my hair, and went downstairs.

"Mom? Are you here?" There was no answer, when someone knocked on the door. I walked to the door.

Sasuke POV

The door opened, and she stood in the doorway. I did a double take, because she looked vaguely like me. Except that her eyes were green. She had an inquisitive look on her face.

"Yes?" She asked. Kakashi-sensei cleared his throat.

"It regards your friend Akira. She isn't where she should be." Cate's eyes narrowed.

"Just a moment, please." She ran upstairs and into her room, I presume, and then came back down with her shurikun pouch and kunai holster strapped in place. She ran outside barefoot, and down the street. We followed her.

"Cate-Chan, where are you going?" Naruto asked.

"Training grounds. She's training." She laughed, and ran ahead. We stopped, and Naruto fell down.

"Those girls," Kakashi muttered, "will be the death of us."

The next morning, Cate POV

I awoke to a screen of leaves above my head.

"I was supposed to... OH SHIT!" I kicked Akira. "Itachi is gay for... Leader Guy!" I whispered in her ear. If insulting her beloved Itachi didn't wake her up, then she was dead. Sure enough...

"What are you saying about my Itach--" I covered her mouth.

"We need to get to the academy, now!" She gulped, and we hauled ass.

-Later-

"Augh, that was brutal..." I wheezed. Kira nodded.

"You said it... Want some ramen?"

"Sure. Yo, Uzumaki!"

"Yeah?"

"Want to take us out for ramen?"

"Nah, I'm kind of depressed." I patted his head.

"Ah well, later, Uzumaki." I kissed his forehead. "Cheer up, kid. I'm sure things will look up soon."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cate: Okay, exams are finally over!

Akira: Cool.

Itachi: Did you disclaim?

Cate: Duh.

Sasuke: Hah, you insulted my stupid big brother! Wait, why does she care? And... Why did you dress like me? And you flipped out when she insinuated that you liked me... what was that all about?

Cate: ...

Akira: ...

Itachi: ...

Sasuke: ...

Cate: Um, anyway...

Naruto: PIE!!

Tobi: YEAH!!


	7. Stupid Bet

Disclaimer: Okay, this is getting really old. All I got is Cate and the plot. Akira is ... Akira's.

_"Cheer up, kid. I'm sure things will look up soon."_

I wiped the sweat off my forehead, and breathed heavily.

"Oi, Cate... we get put on teams tomorrow..." I panted, and she nodded.

"Can we please get down to business now?" I rolled my eyes.

"Spoilsport. Okay." I looked around. "I'll race from here to Ichiraku and back, no holds barred, so to speak, if you lose," I thought for a moment. "You have to proclaim undying love to... Sasuke!" She gagged.

"Okay, but if you lose, you have to declare undying love to Asuma-sensei."

"If we tie?"

"Um... ritual disembowelment."

"What?"

"Just kidding. How about, if we tie, we both have to kiss Kakashi."

"Ew." I said. "Okay."

"On your mark."

"Retrieval ark, _(1)_" I said, crouching into position.

"Save Gaara ark... _(2) _" Cate continued.

"Shippuden! _(3) _" I said, and we took off running.

Since it was no-holds-barred, I actually tied her to a stool in the ramen shop and then ran back to the trees.

She was waiting when I got back.

"What the hell, Saiden?" She growled. I rolled my eyes.

"Maybe I won't untie you after all." I said off-handedly. Her eyes got really big.

"Please... don't make me go through with that bet..." She whimpered. I rolled my eyes again.

"Fine, I'll change it. Since you lost... you have to go be Uchiha's house-slave for one night." I grinned. Her face deadened.

"You got to be kidding."

"Nope."

"Cleaning? You must be. You know I break stuff."

"Yep."

"And sometimes, it's not an accident." She reminded me, and I picked her up and dragged her by holding onto the end of the rope. She kicked and yelled bad words the entire time.

We finally found Uchiha.

"Hoi, Sasuke!"

Cate shut up and just glared at the ground. "Hn."

I held up the end of the rope. "Cate here has so kindly volunteered to be your house-slave tonight."

"Bullshit. I'm only doing this because I lost a bet." She snarled at me.

"Do you want her or not?"

He thought. "I do need someone to do the dishes."

Cate fell over and repeatedly slammed her head on the ground. "Of all the effing chores that he needs done... what did I ever do that makes me so horrible?" She mumbled to herself.

"Oh, just get it done and over with. No sense in giving yourself a concussion."

"Shut up and untie me." I did just that, and she stood, flexing her wrists. She looked at me. "Saiden."

"What?"

"You suck, and I hate you dearly." She straightened, and turned to Sasuke. "Well, Uchiha, take me to your place so I can get started on your dishes." They walked off to his house together.

"Mua ha ha ha ha ha." I cackled. "My plan is coming together beautifully. Mua ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha h-" hack, hack, cough" Oh... I see why Cate-Chan has such a respect for bad guys..." I wandered off to the flower shop.

Cate POV

I walked boredly through Konoha as Uchiha led the way to his place.

"Hey, Forehead Girl! Has he finally taken pity on you, or has he just--" I was there in a flash. Annoying or not, Sakura's actually pretty cool after the time skip. I slammed the girl against the wall.

"Let's see if this can penetrate your thick skull. Call me Forehead-Girl again, and I will KEEL JOO DED! Got it, bitch?" I snarled. She nodded, eyes wide with fright.

_Afraid it might pop off,_

_And when it pop off,_

_Somebody gonna get laid the fuck out. _

I snickered to myself as I dropped her and walked back to where Uchiha was standing.

Sasuke POV

I watched her confusedly. Was she this brutal with everyone? Saiden seemed used to it, but...

Besides that, she took great pride that she wasn't Sakura, so why was she defending her like that? I expected her to just laugh and make Sakura seem as lame as possible. She reached me shortly.

"Can we go now, befoh it pop off?" She asked, and I detected a hint of a smile in her voice. So, we left.

When we got to my house and I showed her my kitchen, she unwound the bandages from her arms, and got straight to work by stacking all the plates on top of one another, and then the bowls. It was peaceful, watching a nearly perfect stranger washing my dishes. It was amazing that this girl, doing the same job as my mother, could evoke entirely different emotions in me.

_Doesn't hurt that she looks like she belongs in my... what am I thinking?_

I shook my head, and then decided that talking would probably distract me from this disturbing line of thought.

"Now," I began, "I only showed you my house because you aren't Sakura, and--" She held up a soapy hand.

"Got it, Uchiha. You trust me not to tell anyone, or sneak in the middle of the night and steal your boxers. Of course, now you owe me a favor."

"For doing my dishes?"

"Hardly, this is because of a bet. I mean, me not telling anyone." I stiffened.

"What is it you want?"

"I want you to do one thing for me."

"Obviously. What is it?"

"That'll cash in later." She turned back to the sink. "Who was the last person to wash these things?"

"My mother." She nodded.

"I see." She stopped talking, and the kitchen lapsed into silence again. I was trying to come up with more small talk when she started singing softly.

"_I don't want to let it lay me down this time.  
Drown my will to fly.  
Here in the darkness I know myself.  
Can't break free until I let it go.  
Let me go.  
Darling, I forgive you after all.  
Anything is better than to be alone.  
And in the end I guess I had to fall.  
Always find my place among the ashes_-- oh shit!" She jerked her hand out of the water. "I'm fucking bleeding! And not even in a fun way!" She paused. "That sounded wrong." I rolled my eyes.

"Stay there, I'll get some medicine and a band-aid."

Cate POV

He came back quickly, and held his hand out. I blinked and laid my injured hand on his palm. He smeared on some medicine, and then put the band-aid on. He looked back at me. I blushed.

"Forgetting something, mom?" I teased, trying to draw attention away from the blush on my face. He very briefly looked confused.

"Hn?" I rolled my eyes.

"Aren't moms supposed to kiss it to make it better? That's how Master Chief Fuji's wife usually does it, when she gets close enough to hold me down and treat my wounds."

"I've never heard that."

"Well then... never mind." I told him, and turned to finish the dishes.

"Oh, no you don't." He said, stepping in front of me.

"What now?"

"I'm not letting you get cut again. It... Looks bad for me if you go to Sakura's place covered in band-aids." I smirked.

"Whatever. The bet means I'm your house-slave for tonight, so I can't go back anyhow, not till midnight." I told him. He paused.

Sasuke POV

"Then you can sleep on my couch until midnight." She shrugged.

"I have to work, or else I haven't honored the bet." I sighed.

"Why did you bet on this? I really want you out of my house." She shrugged again.

"Akira and I always bet on the outcome of our contests. Since we'd be irritatingly even otherwise, all our battles more or less boil down to who can freak the other out more. It was either I be your slave, or I proclaim undying love."

"To who?"

"You." I blacked out.

When I woke up, I was staring at my living room ceiling. The clock next to the couch said midnight, and a note beside it told me that I'd passed out three and a half hours ago. I rubbed my head, and sat up.

"Ow... did I hit my head on the floor?..."

Cate POV

I quickly showered and dressed in a large tee-shirt and some boxers I'd found when I had gone through all Sakura's drawers to take inventory on what clothes she had. I fell back on her bed, and proceeded to plan tomorrow.

_Ugh... I hate planning ahead..._

**You hate that? I love being prepared!**

_What the bloody fuck? Who are you?_

**The question is, who are you? I am Sakura Haruno.**

_Aw, shit. Listen... um... I'm Cate Fuji, and I... um... am taking you over until I either get my own body here, or I go back to my house. Which is, like, God only knows when..._

**Ok, then.** The voice faded out, and I turned out the light and went to sleep.

"Sakura! Get up!"

"Is she not up yet, Ms. Haruno?"

"No, sorry, Ino."

"I'll get her up. You go ahead to work."

"Okay." Footsteps. A deep inhalation. "MASTER CHIEF ON DECK!" I jumped out of bed, hit the floor, and popped up onto my feet.

"Sir!" Laughter. I opened my eyes groggily.

"Snappy salute, even when half-asleep. I'm impressed." She told me. I kicked her in the back of the knee.

"As well you should be. Why'd you wake me?" I asked her, while reaching for a black undershirt.

"Today, we get our sensei! And teams, but whatever..."

"You're only happy because this means I get to hang around the stupid academy for an extra three hours, while you get to go train, or whatever." I said scathingly as I dropped a short-sleeved dark blue t-shirt over my head. I pulled on some dark blue jeans and pulled my hair back.

We went to the academy, and Akira-Chan had to run home to get her headband.

I didn't, because I used mine to accentuate the thinness of my/Sakura's body. Bwa-ha-ha.

Kiba POV

I looked up as the door opened again.

"Oh, it's just you two again. How exactly did you two pass?" Sakura glared at me, and smirked.

"Oh-ho-ho, that's rich, coming from the flea-bitten dog brat." She said.

"Cherry head."

"Flea-bag."

"Fangirl."

"Fang-face."

"Okay, ladies, that's quite enough." Ino said, coming between the two of us. She pushed Sakura down the aisle.

"Yeah, you better thank God she's dragging' me away, Flea-bag!" Sakura yelled, waving her arms. Ino whispered something in her ear, and she relaxed. "Meh." She sat on the edge of a desk, swinging her legs back and forth. Ino told her something. I looked at them again. They seemed... different, somehow. Naruto tapped Sakura's shoulder, and she turned backward.

"Hey, Sakura-Chan!" He said, and she smirked.

"What up, Uzumaki? Uchiha here yet?"

"Nope."

"Hn." He said as he walked in.

"Uchiha? Late?" Sakura gasped.

"Unpresidented!" Ino said. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"You mean 'unprecedented'."

"I was close." Ino sat down between Shikamaru and Choji, and Sakura stood on the seat of the next row down. She started talking to Ino, and suddenly shivered violently. She blinked as if he had no idea where she was, and sat down. She looked at Sasuke and squealed.

"Sasuke!" She jumped on him, and began rubbing her face on his arm.

"Uh, Forehead Girl?" Ino began. Sakura blinked, and looked up at Sasuke's face.

"Uh... Uchiha? Why am I hugging you?" She asked him, and he shrugged.

"God only knows." He replied. She sat up and dusted herself off.

"Anyway." She remembered something and wrote something on a piece of paper, and handed it to Ino. Ino read it and laughed, rolling her eyes. She wrote something and handed it back. They continued like that for a while, before Iruka walked in. Sakura whispered something in Ino's ear. Iruka cleared his throat.

Cate POV

"Miss Haruno, Miss Yamanaka, would you like to share whatever it is with the class?" We turned to faced Iruka, who was talking.

"Not really." Akira said. I whacked her shoulder.

"Sure we would, sensei. Right, Ino-Chan?" She grinned.

"Fine." We walked to the front of the class, and Akira took a deep breath, before performing a transformation into Sasuke.

"_I am really special, cuz there's only one of me_!" I then transformed into Sasuke.

"That's not it, stupid." She stared, then gasped.

"Oh, yeah." She turned back into herself, and proceeded to dance around randomly.

"_F is for friends who break stuff together,_

_U is for you and me, blowing stuff up,_

_N is for no more lighters_

_All cuz your mom happened to see_. Now you try it, Piggy-Chan!" She spun around and stopped beside me.

"_F is for fire that burnt down the whole school,_

_U's for unlimited, cherry bombs,_

_N is for no more homework, when you're_--"

"Ino!" I whacked her on the head. "That's not how it goes!" She grinned sheepishly.

"Shall we sing it together?"

"Yes." We linked arms and she sang first.

_"F is for friends who break stuff together,"_

_"U is for you and me, _

_Blowing stuff up,"_

_"N is for no more lighters, _

_All cuz my mom happened to see!"_

"Thank you, ladies. Now, please sit down so that I can tell you what teams you're on."

"Team seven will be Naruto Uzumaki, Sakura Haruno,"

"Sakura-Chan! We're on the same team!"

"So we are, Uzumaki." I replied boredly, since I knew we would be.

"And Sasuke Uchiha."

"What?!" Naruto jumped up onto the table.

"Something wrong, Naruto?" Iruka asked calmly.

"Why've I got to be stuck with him?" He asked.

"Uzumaki, drop it." I mumbled.

"We needed to pair the smartest student and the, shall we say, lowest test scores together."

"Uh... Sensei?" He sighed.

"Yes?"

"How exactly does Uchiha have the highest scores? It seems more likely that Shikamaru would have the highest score, seeing as he's a genius and all."

"He--"

"However, there's the chance that he slept through it. In which case, he'd have the lowest score, in which case Uzumaki and Uchiha still wouldn't be on the same team." I finished.

"Miss Haruno, do you have FUN disproving my logic?" Iruka asked. I grinned.

"Yes." He sighed.

"Team eight will be..."

I was sitting on a bench, staring at a tree on the other side of the path. I yawned widely.

"I am so dead tired, Akira-Chan..." I muttered to the girl next to me. She glanced down at me, where I had fallen on her shoulder. She rubbed my back.

"Me too, Catie." I shifted my head, bit her shoulder sleepily, and she jumped up violently. I barely kept my head from slamming into the concrete bench. "What the hell?!"

"My name isn't Catie. It's just Cate." I murmured as I laid my head down. She stormed away.

Naruto POV

I saw her sit up and rub her eyes. She stretched. She froze, and pulled her hair over her shoulder. I walked over.

"Hey!" I said, leaving out the name, in case something weird had happened. She looked up at me.

"Naruto... why is my hair black?"

1,2&3-Ready, steady, go! Can I help it if I'm an Otaku?

Me: Ha! A cliffhanger!... okay, it sucks...

Matt: No, it doesn't.

Me: Le Gasp! Matt from Death Note!

Matt: Well, it doesn't.

Cate: Holy Hell! Matt! *takes him aside and whispers* Thanks for lying to her. She gets weird when she feels her writing is screwed up.

Me: Well, if no one reviews, I'm taking away your Game Boy.

Matt: T.T Have mercy! PLEASE REVIEW! I want my Game Boy...


	8. intro, and freakish dreams!

Ok, I'm not gonna say it again...

_"Naruto, why is my hair black?"_

I stared at her.

"What? You dyed it."

"Naruto, think. Why would I dye my beautiful pink hair?"

This statement made me realize that she wasn't Cate anymore.

"Um, I don't know..." Just then Sasuke walked past us, and waved at Sakura half-heartedly, clearly preoccupied. She squealed, and I turned on the spot and went after Sasuke.

"She's not Cate anymore, is she?" He muttered, and I shook my head.

"Nope. I'm not sure what happened." I told him, adjusting my sleeve.

"How sweet!" It was Sakura's voice. We turned. "Did I miss something hot and heavy? Maybe . . . you two were . . . no, never mind. It'd be too much to hope for." I rolled my eyes.

"There's no doubt. It's Cate again." She grinned.

"And aren't you glad to see me?" She said, linking her arms through mine and Sasuke's.

"Surprisingly, yes." Sasuke replied, still preoccupied. She smirked at him.

"Good, because there's no escape."

Cate POV

It had been at least two hours, and we were still waiting for Kakashi. Uchiha and Uzumaki took turns playing tic-tac-toe with me. After a while I curled up on the desk and tried to nap. Uchiha was going over our last game, trying to figure out how he kept losing, and Uzumaki was putting an eraser in the door, to punish our sensei for his lateness.

I finally almost got to sleep when the door slid open. The eraser hit his head with a soft thump. I turned my head.

"Ah, enter the sensei with time problems." He walked in.

"Hmm . . . my first impression of you three? I hate you." (A/N: maybe not his exact word, but it's been a long time since the third episode) I rolled my eyes.

"Sure, sure." He looked annoyed.

"Let's go and introduce ourselves." He said.

We sat down and I laced my fingers under my chin.

"Okay, I guess you need to tell me what it is you want." I began.

"I already sort of know you guys, since I've met you before. However, likes, dislikes, names would be helpful. Goal, dreams for the future, that sort of thing." I thought.

"Okay." I stood up and put my hands behind my back, legs apart. "Catherine Fuji, you can call me Cate, I like training and I dislike children, because they distract from training. My goal in life is to save a certain someone, and my dreams? Well . . . I can't tell you those, because they tend to be very twisted." I finished, and sat down.

"I'm Naruto Uzumaki! Believe it! I like instant ramen-in-a-cup, and I hate the three minutes that it takes to cook it. I really like the ramen Iruka-sensei bought me at the Ichiraku ramen shop. My goal is to taste every flavor of ramen there is, and my dream is to become Hokage, so that all the villagers will have to respect and look up to me."

"My name is Sasuke Uchiha. I don't like a lot of things, and there isn't much that I do like. What I have is not a dream, because I will make it a reality. To kill a . . . certain someone . . . and revive my clan." He said, and I shivered.

"Creepish. Can we train now?"

"Our first mission is in the morning. Be prepared." He left.

"Wow, Disney much?" I muttered, and stood again, stretching.

"Hey, Sasuke! Want to go out for some ramen?"

"No."

"But it's good for your soul . . ." Naruto pressed.

"I have no soul."

"No worries, Uzumaki," I said, patting his back, "I'll go with you, providing you pay, because I happen to be flat broke." Sasuke cleared his throat.

"I'll go with you guys, since you can't seem to pay for anything yourselves." He said boredly.

When we arrived at Ichiraku, Naruto sat at the bar like usual, and ordered. I sat next to him and fiddled with my sleeves, before glancing up at the menu, and ordered a large tea.

"Wha happen, Cat?" I rolled my eyes.

"Watching you eat . . . I'm suddenly not so hungry . . ." I muttered. He just grinned and went back to eating. "Ugh."

"I feel your pain, Haruno." Uchiha muttered, and I stifled a snort. "What?"

"I never thought we'd bond over something as stupid as Naruto's eating habits..."

"What did you think we'd bond over?"

"Your lust for revenge and my knack for merciless training. I thought for sure that we'd become friends when you trained with me the first time and discovered how crazy I am. Of course, just as many times, I've considered bonding with Naruto after drinking his blood, but my psychosis is not the topic under discussion..." I scratched my collarbone and looked over at Uchiha. "I apologize for the scariness. I'm... kind of murderous sometimes."

"I noticed." Uchiha muttered.

"Anyway... either of you guys want to train with me today? After my examination of our sensei, I have compiled a short list of possible ways to defeat him." I discussed tactics with Uchiha while Uzumaki finished stuffing his face.

When I got home after training, I went upstairs to shower, and as I stood under the jet of hot water, I vaguely wondered if I would ever be back in my own body.

"No, probably not anytime soon, anyway." I told myself, and furrowed my eyebrows. "Why do I feel... different?" I shrugged and went to my room to dry off and get ready for bed. I dressed in a pair of underwear and a tank top and crawled into bed.

_A dark room. A beam of light. A sleeping figure. Red eyes. An eerie tune. A pale face that belonged to the eyes. A gloved hand, reaching toward something. A scream of pain. A foreboding feeling. A strained voice._

_"Help! Help me! Cate, you're the only one who can save us!! HELP US!!!"_

I shot up in bed.

"AAH!" I panted for air as my eyes darted around, searching for the source of the voice. When I had determined that I was alone in the room, and fell backward. "Who... who was that...?"

"Yo, Catie, something wrong?" I looked over and saw Akira.

"Akira-chan." My voice was breathless, and she crawled into my room and sat on the end of the bed.

"What happened, _ane-chan?_" She asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. (A/N: ane-chan-- older sister)

"I... I had a nightmare." I told her what had happened; only skipping out on telling her how the entire scene was familiar somehow, although I'd never seen it before. She patted my head.

"Just go to sleep, _ane-chan._" She said softly. "I won't let anyone touch my big sister." I smiled at that, and curled up by my pillows, while she continued to sit on the end of the bed and watch me.

_A beam of light in a dark room. An evil laugh. Crimson pupils. A cruel sneer. A gloved hand, reaching out of a pool of blood. A familiar face. A tear. A voice from the darkness._

_"You brought this on yourself."_

_A strained reply, filled with pain._

_"I... still... love him..."_

_Suddenly, daylight. An empty graveyard. A leaf-strewn path. A lonely headstone. An inscription. _Here lies she who betrayed her clan for love. R. I. P._ A strangled sob. A lonely woman. More headstones. Each makes the lonely woman sadder than the last. A line of those that she loved. A condemning voice._

_"You failed them all." _

_An empty acceptance._

_"I know."_

I sat up again, this time slowly, and saw that she had left. That was fine, since I didn't want her to see me like this. I dressed quickly in a grey tee-shirt and camouflage cargo pants. I tied my headband around my waist and put on my shurikun pouch and kunai holster, and went downstairs, wrote a note for Ms. Haruno, and left for the Hero's Memorial Monument.

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Sorry, you'll have to wait the next chapter for the bell test. Sorry, loves.

Mello: Review or Roger will make me clean my room.

Matt: if that happens, Mells is likely to shoot my game boy. -Shudder-


	9. Cate and Kakashi fight, Sensei falls

Disclaimer- I don't know how to check reviews and stuff, so I can't thank you by name. But thanks. Wait... why is that the disclaimer? CATE!!!!!

Cate- grumble, grumble... I could be training... Bells-n-akira owns nothing. They are merely renting the purple bunny army.

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I got there before nearly everyone else. Uchiha was there, but he was alone. He looked up at me as I walked over.

"Hey, Sakura." I scowled.

"Don't be an idiot. It's Cate, and you know it."

"Snippy much?"

"Much too much." I sat down next to him with a sigh. "I had a couple of nightmares, so I didn't sleep too well."

"Oh. That's too bad." He said. I shrugged.

"Aw, well. Nothing a little silence won't fix. Later, Uchiha." With that, I scaled the tree stump and sat Indian style on top of it, closing my eyes and focusing on reaching another plane of existence. It worked. I could feel myself becoming less tired.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

_I saw a small meadow, surrounded by trees with a waterfall on one side. I smiled, and felt as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. _

_Something by the waterfall attracted my attention, and I walked over and looked into the pool of water. It was very clear, and at the bottom were two catfish, swimming in circles. I smiled again, and suddenly the pool flashed, and I saw a hospital room. I frowned, until I noticed that there were two girls lying in the beds._

_"Oh my geez. Th-that's me?" I said softly. I looked at the other bed. "And... Akira-Chan?" My body shifted slightly. Three people walked in. "Huh?"_

"Oh, Catie! Why'd you have to leave us?!" Shouted a girl with waist length orange hair. The blue tip of her braid contrasted nicely with her white shirt. She nervously fingered the top button.

"Aw, Shin-Chan," whined Saiyori, "when you say it like that, it sounds like she died." Kaname turned and left the room.

"Kana, where're you going?" Shinari asked.

"I can't stay in there. They give me the creeps, looking so peaceful like that. Gods only know what they're thinking. Knowing them, something twisted."

Shinari shrugged.

"Probably." She turned back and placed a get-well card on my bedside table. "Oh, Catie, what happened? Why'd you have to go fishing like that?" She asked, faking drama.

_I shrugged._

_"Because it's more fun to jump in the water with a knife in my teeth." I said, although I suspected that she couldn't hear me. _

_"Who's that?" I turned and only jumped a little when I saw Sakura Haruno standing behind me._

_"That's my friend, Shinari Narumi. She's... sort of like my sister. She sometimes calls me mom."_

_"Why?"_

_"Because I'm the one who first trained her, and got her hooked on it." I replied. She nodded. There was movement on the pool, and we quieted down._

"In here, Sam." In walked a blond boy that was wearing baggy pants and a half-tucked tee-shirt with some nasty stain on it, closely followed by a dark-haired boy in much the same clothes_. I sighed, annoyed already._

_"What is it?" Sakura asked._

_"Sam Minamino and Ichijo Yagami. Those guys are bad news. They care more for themselves than anyone else. And... Sam has this weird obsession with me. He seriously wants me to stop being a military genius, and disrupts my training whenever possible. He says that no thirteen year old should be so hell-bent on dying in battle."_

_"..." _

_I looked over at her, and she was giving me a 'you're a bleeding loony' look._

_"I'm not hell-bent on dying in battle, okay? I just... want to go out with a fight." She nodded._

"Yo, Ichijo, clear out. I need to say later to my girl." The blond boy said with a smirk.

_I lifted an eyebrow._

_"Who's he talking about?" Sakura asked._

_"Let's find out." I growled. _Sam walked to my bedside and grabbed my hand. As soon as Ichijo left, he got on his knees.

"Hey, sexy. If you come on out of that coma, I can show you a real good time. In fact, I may show you one anyway. Call it a science project. Can a comatose body orgasm? I think, with my help, it could happen." He crawled on top of me. _I hissed._

_"Look away, Saku-chan." I said, and she did. I turned back to the pool and narrowed my eyes. __**"Samuel Minamino, get your nasty hands off me!"**_He looked around, and continued lifting my shirt_. __**"This is rape, you pond sludge! There are cameras everywhere, and if you think this'll make me like you, you are sadly mistaken." **__I growled. _He jumped a mile and landed on the floor, racing out the door. _I turned and touched Sakura's shoulder._

_"Yes?"_

_"You can look now." _

_She nodded. She brushed herself off and sat next to me._

_"So... is this yours?" _

_I snapped back from my daydream._

_"Hmm? Oh, yeah. This is my happy place. It's where I go when I need to think about something profound, like the meaning of existence or how best to tell Shinari that I accidentally let my dog eat her pet bird." _

_She giggled._

_"It's nice here."_

_"Yeah." I smiled again. "No place better. So... how are things in this boringly happy place?"_

_"What?" She asked, and I stood up_

_"Just a moment." I looked to the left, and then to the right. I took off straight ahead of me, and launched myself into a handstand. I swung my legs around and hit my assailant in the face, just before he managed to hit me. He went to the ground, and kicked my arms out from under me. I hit the ground, and rolled to a stop about a foot from him. He kicked out at me as I rose, and I flipped backward, taking myself out of reach, and forcing him to follow. Sure enough..._

_"You shall not escape!" I furrowed my eyebrows, and he took advantage of my confusion to take a swing at me. _

_"Ack! Aw man, Fuji, minus eight for getting distracted," I said, and grabbed his arm, twisting it up behind his back. "But, plus five for resourcefulness and another two for," I turned and flipped him over my shoulder, "taking charge of the situation and disabling the target." He vanished, and Sakura jogged over._

_"Who was that?" She asked, and I tilted my head to the side._

_"Ya know, I've never thought to ask. Weird. Anyway, I've recently discovered that I think well when I'm in battle, so that guy's a recent addition." I told her, and suddenly felt a jolt shoot through my stomach. "Nng!" I clutched my stomach, and hit my knees._

_"Cate-san?" Sakura asked worriedly._

_"I... I think it's time I left..." I stood, waved goodbye, and walked out of my happy place._

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I came back to reality with a jolt and sat up.

"What the bloody hell happened?"

"You were sitting up there," Naruto pointed upward. "And all of a sudden, you said something about a new addition, and fell off."

I nodded.

"Did I say anything else?"

"No." Uchiha answered.

"Okay." I sighed. "Then you heard nothing important. That's good." I stood and dusted myself off.

"I didn't ask this earlier because I didn't see it, but... why is USMC written on your shirt?" Sasuke asked.

"United States Marine Corps." I said. "When is Kakashi gonna get here?" I asked. Just then, he walked over. "Oh, great timing." I said, and adjusted my shirt. "So, what's the deal?"

"I was late because--"

"Whatever, what's the test?" I asked, and he frowned at me.

"It's rude to interrupt people."

"It's rude to be three hours late to your own gathering, so I guess we're about even." He frowned.

"Anyway, your test is to get the two bells from me. You have until noon. If you don't get a bell, no lunch and it's back to the academy with you."

"Blah blah. Get on with it." I said. He frowned at me again, and Naruto started to launch himself at Kakashi. I grabbed the back of his jacket, and yanked him back. "Not yet, Uzumaki." I whispered, never taking my eyes off of Kakashi. Kakashi watched me back.

"Smart girl. Alright... go!" He vanished. I looked around, and saw that the other two had already gone themselves.

"Oh, come on." I grumbled.

I turned and walked to the trees, moving as soon as I was under cover of greenery. It might confuse him, if only for a few seconds. I examined the area, and created three clones.

"Scout out the area, and let me know if you find Uzumaki or Uchiha." I told them, and they nodded before leaving. I narrowed my eyes. "This was too easy." I whispered, and spun around, and saw Kakashi smile at me.

"Smart girl." He said, and then I was surrounded by a cyclone of leaves.

When it subsided, I was in the forest. I looked around. I figured that since the plot of the show was already so fucked up, something different would happen to me.

"C-cate-Chan... Help me..."

I looked for the source of the noise, and lifted an eyebrow at Uchiha's bleeding body that was crawling toward me.

"What?"

"K-Kakashi... He's... too strong..."

I sighed heavily.

"Oh, please. There is nothing about this that is realistic. For one thing, with that much blood-loss, he would be dead. For another, Uchiha would rather die than ask for help. For yet another, he is smart enough to not let himself get so injured fighting a stupid jounin that missed all these important details. Lastly..." I rolled my eyes. "Uchiha Sasuke would never in his life call ME Cate-chan. He knows better." I ran away. "Honestly, you shouldn't underestimate the five-time class valedictorian of the most prestigious military boarding school in three countries." I mumbled. I looked around and saw Naruto. I threw a kunai at the rope that was holding him up, and he rolled to a stop in front of me. I jumped over him.

"Cate-Chan?" He asked as he stood to catch up.

"I have a plan, but I'm gonna need both you and Uchiha."

He nodded.

"I'll go find Kakashi. You find Sasuke." He said, and took off. I raised both eyebrows.

"Wow. When did he get so authoritive? Whatever." I altered my course slightly. I dashed through the forest, dodging trees easily. I tripped over a root, and had to quickly land on my hands and flip over to avoid stopping my momentum. "Wow. That was cool." I said. I shook my head, and spun around another tree.

I finally reached a clearing and saw a head sticking out of the ground. I unfortunately overshot my goal, and had to take a kunai out of my holster, stick it in the ground, and use it to pivot around and skid on my knees to a stop in front of him.

"Was all that really necessary?" He asked. I shrugged.

"Yes, it was. Just admit you thought it was awesome." I panted. He stared at me like I was crazy.

After I got him out, I debriefed him on the plan, and we went to find Uzumaki.

(Debrief- tell him the details/ explain/ give info to him. Not what you pervy readers were thinking, which would have made this an M rated fic)

When we reached Uzumaki and our sensei, I ran forward into the fray.

"Tag-out!" I said, and punched Kakashi. He disappeared. "Uzumaki," I whispered, "go see Uchiha and he'll tell you the plan." He nodded. "Duck!" He ducked, and I used his head to push myself off the ground and kick Kakashi in the face.

"Hm, you're much better than I expected."

"Meh." I said, and went to kick again, but he caught my leg and knocked me down.

"Settle down, Catie. The big boys are playing now." He went to attack Naruto, who had to hurriedly defend. I stood and growled.

"Hey, Scarecrow!" He turned, and I kicked him in the balls. He crumbled in pain, and I grabbed his head and slammed it into my knee. "Do not EVER turn your back to me in battle, GOT IT?!" I yelled. I was only mildly shocked when he did his vanishing act. I growled, and felt something about to hit me, so I ducked and spun to the right, only for him to kick my legs out from me, and plant a foot on my chest.

"That hurt, Catie." He said, and I grinned ferally.

"That was kind of the point, Scarecrow. You know, for a jounin, you're awfully stupid." I remarked, and he looked confused, but only until Naruto and his clones grabbed his arms and kept them from forming signs. Uchiha reached out and plucked the bells from his waist. "Enjoy ninja hood, boys." I said, gasping for air.

Kakashi was released, and I was carried by Uchiha to the three stumps, since Uzumaki had tired arms, and Kakashi was mean to me.

After lunch, Naruto asked a question. Kakashi and Uchiha perked up and listened for my response.

"How in the world did you come up with that plan?"

"Well, while you guys were over here being ninja, I was in the US, going to the most celebrated military boarding school in three countries. I was top of my class five years in a row. Thus, I was able to come up with that plan somewhat easily." I laid back. "Mind you, I'd had my plan brewing all morning, but figuring a jounin into my equation rather than a normal carbon-based biped took me a rather long time." I said on a sigh.

"Aw, Catie is tired. Does she need to go home and sleep?" Kakashi asked sarcastically. I peered at him.

"You seriously want me to kill you, don't you?" I asked him. I stood up and started to walk away. I stumbled a little, and my two newest best friends both rushed over to catch me.

"You okay, Cate?" Uchiha asked.

"Yeah, Cate-Chan, are you okay?" Uzumaki echoed.

"I'm fine, guys." I suddenly remembered the dreams from last night. "On second thought, maybe just a little rest."

"Your place or mine?" Uchiha asked Uzumaki over my head.

"Yours. Mine's ... kind of messy." Uzumaki said.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When we got to Uchiha's place, they set me down on the couch, and Uchiha went to make tea. I sighed.

"Uh, question, Uzumaki, why do you care about me so much?"

"Because," He grinned, "You're my friend." I leaned backward on the couch.

"Yeah, but... I've only known you for about... four days." I said, counting backward in my head. "I wonder..."

"Okay, tea's ready." Uchiha said, walking in. "I hope you like jasmine, because that's all I have." My head snapped up.

"Jasmine tea?" I asked. Jasmine tea is the favorite tea of Iroh, the Dragon of the West, from Avatar, and I totally love him! As like my dad... I drank the tea, and spewed the tea across the table. I'd tasted jasmine tea before. It was good, and it didn't taste like... THAT!

"Cate-chan, what's wrong?" I frowned.

"This is not tea! This is... tea leaf juice..." I said.

"Isn't that what all tea is?" Sasuke asked, and I scowled at him.

"I cannot believe you, the supposed genius, would say something so ridiculous! I'm ignoring you for the rest of the day." I pouted.

"But, logically," He began.

"HUMPH!!!" I said loudly.

"Sometimes, I wonder how you could be any better than Sakura." He said, and I belched loudly, earning a high-five from Naruto. "And then something like that happens, and I remember."

"What?" I asked.

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Rayne--Alrighty, go easy on me. I'm bad a fight scenes and stuff. I'm better at romantic crap -gag- and plot and talking. Like the thing in Cate's happy place.

Bells-- What? Ane-sama, what are you doing here?

Rayne-- Writing, what's it look like?

Tsuki-- I've been forgotten. --GLARE OF DOOOOOM!--

Rayne-- Ah, the last of my crazy sisters.

Akira-- What? I thought... Nevermind. Three Bells. Just what the world needs.

Rayne-- Stow it. Oh, and I thank everyone in next chapter, cuz I figured how to check the review, so I expect to see 20. And Shinari-chan? This one is dedicated to you.

Matt- REVIEW OR THEY"LL TRASH MY GAMEBOY!! HAVE A HEART!!

Bells-- Mattie?

Matt- SAD FACE!!! WHY'S IT ALWAYS MY GAMEBOY?!


	10. Enter Demon Brothers

Disclaimer-... whatever. I refuse to conform to your ridiculous ideas of ownership.

Okay, thanks to...

**Naru-chan13, ELIE101- 3x!!! Thankyouthankyouthankyou!**

**Luffly Emi, SKYE desu ka, TFK-fan118, Sapphir3Tig3r, crystalfeather, Tenten-n-Senbonz, Shinari-chan! One-time review or not, I still think you are awesome! Thank you!**

**and my two non-logged in reviewers! I heart you guys, all of you!!! ^__^**

**Anyway...**

**_____________________________________________________________________**

**Sasuke POV**

_"What?"_

I shook my head.

"Nothing."

"Wait." She paused for a moment. "I'm ignoring you today..." She said, and I rolled my eyes.

"Hn."

-----------

The next ten missions were all D-rank, meaning Naruto complained a lot. One day, standing on the bridge where we waited, Cate flicked the side of my head.

"Hn?" I asked, and she shrugged.

"I don't know. I'm just bored. I flat out hate laziness, but staying in one place for so long...." She frowned. "Moron-sensei has made me lackadaisical."

"Hey, Cate-chan!"

We both turned to look at Naruto as he came onto the bridge.

"What it is, Uzumaki?"

"Look alive! Kakashi's coming." He said, and Cate nodded.

"Ah, the imminent arrival of Moron-sensei." She muttered, leaning against the rail. He appeared.

"Hey, guys!" He crooned. Cate glared and bared her teeth at him.

"You're late again, Moron-sensei." She growled. He rolled his eye.

"Why call me such a mean name, Catie?" He mock-whined.

"Because." She folded her arms across her chest. "You are a stupid lazy pervert jounin who is always late. You were defeated by genin, who weren't even really genin at the time, and you missed very important details that could have helped you to victory. Such as that genjutsu you tried to work on me. That was just ridiculous." She looked at him. "I'm not here to point out your mistakes; I'm here to assist the village by doing missions. So, what's today's odd job?"

Kakashi sighed.

"We'll be weeding a garden."

Cate face-faulted.

"Damn it all to a bloody and painful hell." She muttered. I looked over at her.

-------------------------------------------------------------- About two weeks later...

Cate POV

_"What're your positions?"_

_"Twenty meters west of the target."_

_"Twenty meters east of the target, believe it!"_ So, Uchiha and Uzumaki were on opposite sides. Interesting.

"Approximately fifteen meters and closing to the north."

_"Cate, I didn't say move yet."_

"Hey, the cat's coming to me, alright?" I watched the cat, and lowered my head a little, using my bangs to shade my face. "Target confirmed. Anytime, now, Moron-sensei."

_"Cate..."_ I didn't have to be a genius to hear the patient tone. I reflected back, remembering how he'd slowly gotten used to the nickname over the last two weeks...

_"Cate-chan, focus!"_ I snapped back.

"Sorry. The cat's still here. Should I attempt to catch him?"

_"Wait until the others are in position." _I couldn't help but gag at his affectionate tone.

"Whatever." I said. I heard chuckling at my petulant tone. I watched the cat as it suddenly jumped at a butterfly, and tore off after it. "Aw, crap!" I sad, jumping into motion, my torn black tee-shirt fluttering around my waist.

_"What happened, Catie?" _Kakashi asked. And strangely, I'd gotten used to him calling me that...

"Target has changed course." I said quickly, tailing the animal. "The damn cat went after a butterfly. Direction is south, about thirty-six meters from the clearing, and growing. You guys might want to hurry."

I jumped up into a tree, and leapt from branch to branch, and finally stopped when the foolish cat jumped onto an island in a river. He not only lost the butterfly, but also got himself trapped, as the log he'd walked over on washed away. "Never mind, guys. I got it." I slid down the tree and jumped onto the small island. "C'mere, little Tiger." I said coaxingly, holding my arms out and bending down slightly. He jumped into my arms, and I stroked his back. "That's a good cat. Hold tight." I held him against my chest as I jumped back to the forest.

"Cate-chan, there you are!"

I held him out with one hand.

"Take the cat." The cat walked over and jumped on Kakashi, and I folded my arms across my chest. "Let's get out of here."

--------------

"Alright, mission complete. Let's see, what else do we have for you? Babysitting the Lord of Fire Country's children... shopping...."

"NO WAY!!" Naruto yelled.

"Excuse me?" Asked the Hokage.

"I'm tired of all these crap missions!" He replied.

"What an idiot." Sasuke muttered.

"But you can't deny, he has a point, Uchiha." I said.

"S'true."

Then the Hokage went on a rant, only to stop when he realized Uzumaki was talking to us. I was half-asleep, so I probably didn't look conscious, but no one said anything, so I guess I always looked out of it. Not a flattering opinion, but whatever.

"Hokage-sama, all due respect, but how can you expect us to improve when all we're allowed to do is weed gardens and watch children?" I asked.

"Well, if you think you can handle it..." He pulled a scroll with a bunch of c's on it.

"Yosh!" I mumbled, grinning inwardly.

"You can escort someone on a journey."

"Cool! Who is it? A princess? A daimyo?" Naruto asked excitedly.

"Are these the ones that're supposed to escort me?"

"Ah, Tazuna-san." The Hokage said. We turned to the newcomer, and my nose wrinkled in disgust.

"What's your problem, girly?" He asked.

"Cate-chan, calm down..." Uzumaki whispered. I blew out a sigh.

"Well, Tazuna-san, you smell like booze. The scent is unpleasant." I replied.

"Well, I didn't ask your approval, girly. And you, short stuff. Are you really even a ninja?"

I growled and prepared to launch myself at the old man, but Kakashi grabbed the back of my shirt.

"Naruto, Sakura, no killing the client." He said. I looked up at him.

"Just a little dead?" Naruto asked.

"No."

"Come ON, Moron-sensei! Please?" I asked.

"No."

"You suck."

He just ruffled my hair.

"Your mission starts in two hours." Hokage-sama told us. We left and went our separate ways.

I walked into the house.

"I'm back, Mom!" I called. There was no reply. I wondered why she was never here when I was, but dismissed it as I climbed the stairs. I went to my room and sat on the bed. "Let's see... bandages would smooth things out..." I grabbed a roll and stuck it on the bed. "Some hydrogen peroxide? Yes..." I tossed a bottle onto the bed. "A brush.... and of course, clothes."

I went to the dresser and got some clean underwear, and tossed them onto the bed, before I heard the doorbell ring, and went downstairs to answer it.

"Can't be Akira-chan... She'd just come in through the window or something..." I opened the door. "Hello?"

"Uh, h-hey, Sakura..."

I lifted an eyebrow.

"What brings you to my neck of the woods, Inuzuka?"

"I... I was wondering.... Have you seen Akamaru?" He asked.

"What, you lost him?" I asked, and he hung his head.

"No.... well... kind of.... He wasn't with me when I woke up this morning.... I've been searching all day..." He said. I face-palmed.

"He's probably doing 'dog business'."

"Like what?"

"Well, he might have smelled a bitch in heat." I said.

"W-what? Oh, female dog.... right...." He turned to leave. "Bye."

"Later, Inuzuka..." I said, watching to make sure he actually left. I shut the door, and was half-way up the stairs when a knock was heard. I sighed and went back down. I opened the door. "What now?"

"Hey, Cate." He said dully. I leaned on the door frame and folded my arm across my chest.

"What?" I asked.

"..."

"Spit it out, man."

"Kakashi says to meet him on the bridge in an hour, and to be on time."

"Can do. Later." I started to shut the door, but it stopped on something. Uchiha's foot. "Something else you needed to say?"

".... Hn." He turned and left, and I stared at his back.

"... Okay, then." I shut the door and dashed up to my room to finish packing.

A half hour later, I got a feeling that I was being watched. I marked it down as my usual paranoia, and turned back to cleaning the room. I grabbed some black pants and a white shirt, and took a quick shower before I went back to the room to get dressed. I took a look at myself in the mirror, and decided that I was too dressed-up. So I ditched the button-down for my grey USMC tee-shirt, and dug out a clean pair of camo cargos.

I slid my shoes on and walked to the bridge. I frowned when I saw that it was empty, and glanced up at the sun.

"Hmm... It's only been about forty-five minutes..." I muttered. I kept walking past it, and sat down on a bench a little ways from it. I leaned back, and my back popped. "Boredom..."

Fifteen minutes later, I jerked awake.

"Whoa! Time for sleeping is later, girl!" I mumbled to myself.

"Hn. Do you always talk to yourself?" He asked, sitting next me.

"Only when it's important." I said, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. "So. Uchiha."

"Cate."

"I get the feeling that the others aren't coming. So why don't you tell me why you REALLY wanted me to come here, and we'll start from there." I said, turning to him.

"..."

"Well, if that's your explanation, I'm going back. I have to get my bag anyway."

"Hn." He got up and followed me.

"There any particular reason that you're following me?" I asked, and he grunted in response.

Most of the walk passed that way, with my occasional question, and his reply, which, without fail, was always 'Hn' or 'tch'. I was about a hair's width from hauling off and punching his lights out.

We got to my house, and suddenly, Akira-chan burst from hers.

"Hey! Hey!!"

I turned to her.

"My name is not 'hey'." I replied. She nodded.

"I know, but.... Why are you and Uchiha on a date?!"

"We're not on a date." I told her, raising one eyebrow.

"But.... but...."

"Sorry to have foiled your evil plan, but the two of us are just teammates. Nothing more." I said, patting her head.

"Oh, and my mom says I need to go to the Land of Waves to get a rare flower, so I'm coming with you guys." She said, and leaned against the side of my house. I pulled my keys out and unlocked the door.

"Well, at least I won't be the only female there." I said, climbing the stairs. Akira followed me, and I turned back to see where Uchiha went. He was standing in the doorway. "You can come up if you want. I made sure to pick up my underwear before I left."

"CATE!!" Akira said, shocked and disapproving.

"What?" I asked. She just shook her head. We went to my room and I grabbed my bag. I descended the stairs as I slung it over my shoulder. "You need to pack your stuff. Meet you at the gate." I said to Akira as I left the house. I locked up and put the key over the door. She nodded, and went to the flower shop.

I hooked my thumbs through my belt loops and walked slowly to the gate, waving to the occasional villager. I looked up at the sky, thinking to myself that someday, they'd be waving at ME, not Master Chief's daughter, not the prodigy of the Fuji family, just Cate...

I crashed into someone and fell on my butt. I sat up and rubbed my head.

"Ouch... Hey, asshole, watch where I'm walking..." I growled.

"Sakura Haruno?"

Uh oh. I know that voice. I looked up at the surprised jounin.

"Eh heh heh... H-hey.... Asuma-sensei...." I stood up and dusted off my pants. "I.... I, uh..."

"Sakura, come on. We're going to be late." Uchiha said, walking past and grabbing my arm.

"Yipe! Later, Asuma-sensei!" I waved as he dragged me away.

When we got out of sight, Sasuke let go of my arm.

"Can you go three minutes without insulting someone?" He asked.

"Hn." I replied, and continued toward the gate.

When I arrived, Uzumaki and Moron-sensei, as well as the drunk, were waiting. I ruffled Uzumaki's hair, and Akira walked up and began to explain things to Moron-sensei. I watched with excitement as she smiled and shook his hand.

She ran over and high-fived me.

"The plan is in motion." She said. I rolled my eyes.

"..." I replied, and she looked at me.

"Are you turning into him?" She asked, pointing to Uchiha. I shrugged.

"Mmm..."

"Say something only you would say!" She said, and I thought.

"War is hell." I flashed a grin. "But blowing stuff up is damn fun."

"Okay, thank god." She sighed.

"Prove your identity." I said, and she looked at me.

"Bitch, please." She said dismissively.

"Alright. So we're who we say we are, at least." I folded my arms. "Can we go now?"

We set out, slowly at first, with Uzumaki and Uchiha in front, then Tazuna, and Akira and I were in the back, with Kakashi behind us. I noticed a glimmer on the side of the road, and tugged on Tazuna's sleeve.

"Oi, Tazuna-san. Has it rained recently?" I asked when he looked back at me.

"No."

"I see..." I said, glancing back at Akira. She nodded, meaning that she heard. I stopped walking and waited for her to catch up.

"So the demon brothers are close." She whispered to me, careful not to let Kakashi hear us.

"I can't wait." I replied.

"Question. I'm not used to fighting anyone but you. How should I go about this?"

"Do what you usually do to me. If you can figure out weaknesses in their attacks and exploit them, you can take them down. Just follow my lead."

"Why is it always YOUR lead?"

"Because. I know what I'm doing." I told her, smirking.

"Bitch."

There was a noise behind us.

"Fuck!" Akira yelled. I turned back.

"Moron-sensei, DUCK!!" I watched, horrified as he was cut into pieces before my eyes. "MORON-SENSEI!!!!"

The demon brothers disappeared, and materialized behind Uzumaki.

"One little piggy..."

_________________________________________________

Aight, im is dead on this chapter, so feed my inner plot bunnies with comments, flames, i don't care. A review is a review.


	11. epic spaz

Disclaimer: ... I'm madface..... Kishimoto won't share.......

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_"One little piggy..."_

My eyes widened.

"Uzumaki, Uchiha, protect Tazuna-san!" Cate yelled.

"Hell yeah!" I said, and jumped into the fight. I kicked one of them in the face, and gave him a black eye. Somehow, he got in front of me, and I took a step backward. I bumped into something, and saw Cate looking back at me. I grinned, she smirked, and I grabbed her hands. I swung her around at Demon Bro 2 and she kicked him in the face as I turned around and punched him. I heard a popping noise, and looked back to see Sasuke tying up DB1 with the chain thingy.

_Alright, time to show that I'm not just a pretty face._ I thought to myself, ducking one of his punches. I fell backward onto my hands and kicked the guy with both my feet, putting my entire body weight behind it. He dissolved into water, and I had to hastily rethink my plan. I landed on my feet, stumbled a little, and spun around. DB2 was about to hit Cate!

"CA- uh, SAKURA!!"

She looked up, and rolled out of the way, so that DB2 ended up hitting his brother. Cate dragged DB1 out of the way, for whatever reason, and I ran over and jumped on DB2, and put him a chokehold with my legs.

"UZUMAKI!!" I looked up and saw that DB1 had scratched Naruto, and that Kakashi now had said demon brother in a headlock.

"Sorry it took me so long, Naruto. I didn't realize you'd freeze up. Sakura, once again, good planning. Though perhaps, next time, you could include YOUR team?"

"They were included. Someone had to watch Tazuna-san." She said sarcastically.

"Be that as it may, Sakura." He said, and she scowled. "And Sasuke, good work helping her."

I patted Cate's back.

"It's okay, Cate. He's just trying to get us all acclimated to each other." I whispered. She grumbled, and folded her arms across her chest. Although, to my credit, she looked, not mad, but only mildly irritated.

"Whatever." She said.

After a moment, Naruto started screaming.

"NO! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! I'M STILL NOT HOKAGE!!"

Cate rolled her eyes.

"Uzumaki, you aren't going to die unless you keep jumping around screaming like that." She said dryly. "If you've got your heart beating a million miles an hour, you'll be dead in a flash." He froze. "Kakashi, what should we do?"

"We should try to get the poison out."

"Can do!" Naruto said, and stabbed his hand. Blood gushed out.

"What the hell, Uzumaki?!" Cate yelled, and punched him in the head. She grabbed his hand and wiped the excess blood on her shirt. She rinsed the hand with hydrogen peroxide and began to wrap it with bandages.

"Always prepared, huh, Forehead?" I teased. She looked up at me and smirked.

"Like a freaking girl scout." She furrowed her eyebrows. "Or is it boy scouts that are always prepared?"

"Hell if I know. Both, probably." We shrugged in unison.

"Not like it matters. Now, Uzumaki, I'm disturbed by the readiness with which you were prepared to stab yourself." She launched into some lecture about the downsides of disturbing her, most of which involved pain, blood, and a monkey wrench. Don't laugh, it's pretty painful. She's a hardass.

---

After we had gone back to walking, and had done so for a while, Cate stopped in the middle of the road, held her nose up high, and sniffed.

"Smell that, Pig?" She asked, and I tested the air. The air smelt like blood, sweat, exertion, and a certain type of rare fish that is highly poisonous to humans.

"Smells like a fight."

"A fight we're destined to lose."

"Fuck destiny. Destiny can kiss my ass."

"My thoughts exactly." She murmured, looking around. Naruto looked at us.

"You guys can smell fights?"

"No. Life's funnier if we pretend we can, though." I said, shrugging.

I was completely and utterly bored. We've been walking for hours and nothing has happened. I looked to my left and saw Kira sleeping while she walked, Sasuke on my right seemed to be off in his own world, and Naruto, of course, was walking in front of us boiling with energy. This going to be a long trip.

"Everyone stop!" Kakashi halted us, "We have company," It seems I spoke to soon.

"Well well. You must be Kakashi Hatake, the copy-cat ninja... No wonder the demon brothers failed. No matter."

I knew he was going to give a long speech so I started to form a plan. I can use a genjutsu to make it seem like I'm standing still and have my clone sneak up behind him during his speech then-

"Hey, shark-man! Why don't you shut the hell up and fight! Or are you to scared I'll kick your arse and make you scream uncle?"

He charged us as I realized any and all plans I had were lost once Kira opened her mouth.

Well shit...

I mentally cursed Akira's obsessive need to yell out her intentions to kick someone's ass, when she could just as easily have caught them by surprise.

"Pig, you realize that he's now got his guard up, don't you?"

She looked at me.

"I never liked sneak attacks in the first place... and besides you can do whatever while I distract him." I gave her a suspicious look. There was no way she planned that far ahead.

"You just made that up as an excuse didn't you?"

She blinked.

"...No comment."

I thought so. She charged forward, in a very Uzumaki-style charge, and, as expected, her attack failed.

"Damn. They just don't make subordinates like they used to." I muttered, and Akira snarled at me.

"Who you calling a--"

"Now is not the time, Pig." I said boredly, wishing I could call forth some enthusiasm for battle. I heard a battle cry and saw Naruto clones charging him, and just as I was about to put my plan into action, Kakashi said the most ridiculous thing.

"Sakura! Guard the bridge builder!" He joined the others in the fight.

"What? Uchiha take my place!" He was already with the others. "Damn..."

I stood beside the bridge builder sullenly.

"You don't seem very enthused to keep me safe." He commented.

"Shut up and don't draw attention to yourself. That would only make our job harder." He frowned at me but thankfully shut his mouth. I saw Kakashi get trapped in a water prison. He told us to "save ourselves" and I laughed. He obviously doesn't know us that well.

"Like we're going to leave a helpless old man to the shark! You are so not taking the credit for this fight!" I sweat-dropped. Typical Kira...

"Yeah! What Ino said!" Of course Naruto would ag-oh my god is Sasuke nodding? He is!! What the hell! I sighed.

"Of course, they get to be so heroic, and I'm stuck back here watching a wrinkled old-as-dirt moron who has no idea how much I hate him for the lie he told." I muttered, but the old guy heard me.

"Lie? What lie?"

"Don't play stupid, old man. I know you lied about this being a C-rank mission to save money. There no way a guy like him qualifies as 'bandits and rogue highwaymen'. You lied, I know it, and you know it, stop

pretending."

"WHAT THE HELL?" Kira yelled. "HE LIED?!"

"No way around it. But, if you're going to make me watch him, could you at least fight the battle, before I go over there and leave him exposed?" She pouted but got back into the fight. I noticed Sasuke being overly dramatic with his demon-wind shuriken. I sighed.... again. I'm so bored. Zabuza dodged the fake one. Now the real. Another sigh.

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Kakashi was freed and we all turned to Kira. "I'm in the middle of a battle which should make me happy but your stupid attitude is making me depressed!"

"Your problem, not mine," She cursed me under her breath while dodging. She let Kakashi take over and charged me. "Oh shit." I muttered, and braced myself for impact. As expected, she hit me about waist-level, and we both went down.

"Forehead, GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME!" She yelled, and I looked at her.

"Whatever could you be talking about?"

"The fight! Stop being so depressing and emo all the time! Don't you want to enjoy this?"

"Oh, but I don't get to, because I have to watch Old and Drunk over here." I said, feigning innocence. She snarled.

"Fine, I'll make Uchiha do it." She said, but I stopped her.

"No, this is his and Uzumaki's fight. I'm just pissy today." I said evenly, getting up and dusting myself off.

"What is it, your...?"

"No, not today."

"Oh, okay. Good. You're evil when you're on it." I rolled my eyes and grabbed her shirt before she could jump back into the fight. She looked at me.

"What the-"

"Like I said, it's THEIR fight." She sulked.

"But what if-"

"No"

"They-"

"No"

"Cant I-"

"No"

"But Forehead-"

"Don't start, Pig." She gave me her "puppy eyed" look and I resisted rolling my eyes. "Please. You know that doesn't work on me."

"Nothing works on you."

"Damn skippy." She glared at me and I glared back. This was war. And, as we both knew, war is something I am very good at. Especially when it came to idiots with brawn and no brain... not pointing any fingers of course… Heh heh…

She sighed. "Fine. You win."

"As always." I patted her on the head. "I really don't see why you continue to try."

"Just wait until we're free to fight again. You are so dead." She hissed.

"I'm looking forward to it, Piggy." I said, smirking.

"Um, ladies?" Said the bridge builder a bit hesistantly.

"Yeah?" Kira said as we both looked up at him and saw that everyone had stopped fighting to stare at us.

"Would you look at that, Piggy? They think we're more interesting than the fight." I said as she stood up and dusted herself off. She held out her hand and I took it so that she could help me up.

"Probably because we're more likely to kill each other than the average set of friends." She responded, laughing.

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Alright. This is the last time ima say it. 20 reviews or no more update. It's up to you, shin-chan and Naru-chan. Three reviews. Thats all I need.


	12. hey, WHAT!

**Disclaimer:... im not gonna say this evr again... see last chappie for disclaimer**

**OH MY GAWD NARU-CHAN13 AND SHANARI-CHAN!!! *hugs* A round of applause for my wonderful reviewers, who went above and beyond the call of duty, as Cate would put it, to grant my wish! Hey, Mr. Wonderful, oh ur so incredible, hey mr. wonderful, wonderful to me! *singing***

**Cate-- I'll go get her and make her write again.**

**---------------------------**

"_Probably because we're more likely to kill each other than the average set of friends." She responded, laughing._

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"Yeah, well, aren't we supposed to be fighting them?" I asked, and Akira laughed.

"Ah, but you said no."

"Moron-sensei, take care of the shark."

"Erm... He's taken care of..."

"Er... Right..." For some reason, that made me blush, but I quickly frowned. I felt an odd sensation on the back of my skull, as if someone were watching me. I pulled out a kunai, focused on the feeling behind me, and whirled around, releasing the projectile at just the right moment, and held my breath. I heard a distictive thud that told me that I had missed. "Damn." I muttered.

"Who are you?" Kakashi asked.

"I am Haku." Said the feeling from the tree, and jumped down to reveal itself to be a... Boy? Girl? No one really knows, although I have my theories. "And that is my target that you have just taken down. He is Zabuza Momochi and he is a fugitive of the Hidden Mist."

"Well, duh." Kira retorted.

"Anyone who was watching earlier could have told us that, seeing as he used Hidden Mist jutsu, not to mention that Moron-sensei and he said all that before the big battle. Tell us something we don't know."

"Yeah, like whether you're a boy or a girl!" Akira yelled, and I face-palmed.

"Something important." I said, irritated.

"... I am part of the Hidden Mist Village's ANBU."

Naruto charged. "Raaagh--!" He was stopped by Kakashi's arm.

"Stop." He said softly.

"What?! This kid, who's no different from me, just killed the guy it took three of us to even knock out! I can't accept this! We look like idiots!"

"Naruto, you have to get used to it. There are people younger than you who are stronger than me." Kakashi said.

"Your battle is over. Now I must dispose of this corpse because it seems to be a body of many secrets. Now if you'll excuse me," Haku disappeared in a swirling wind of leaves. Naruto crumpled down to the ground, punching it continuously and going on about some thing until Kakashi grabbed his hand. Naruto pouted and got up, still frustrated.

"I know it hurts, not being the best, but it gives you something to aim for, right?" I put my arm around Naruto's shoulder. "Next time, you just have to be better." I kissed the top of his head softly, then pushed him away. "Now, Moron-sensei, we have to talk."

"Let's all go to my house! We can rest there." Tazuna said. We all smiled, except of course Uchiha, who just smirked, and headed for Tazuna's place. Suddenly, Moron-sensei buckled, and Kira-chan and I rushed forward to catch him.

His full weight on our shoulders caused us to let out a woof of air, and our knees bent a little, but we straightened back up.

"How can you lift him?" Naruto asked.

"Years of weight-training, Uzumaki." I grunted. "Could we continue on, please?"

-----------

"Kakashi-sensei's awake!" Naruto yelled.

"Yeah, we know, Uzumaki." I said, then turned to Kakashi. "So. Moron-sensei."

"Sakura."

"I don't think we can trust that Haku kid."

"And why not?" He asked, and I could feel everyone's attention turn to me.

"I have a feeling that Haku's up to no good." Everyone looked back at Kakashi.

"You're a genin. It's natural to be a little apprehensive after your first major battle." Back to me.

"I don't get nervous, sensei." Back to him.

"You're human. Everyone gets nervous." Back to me.

"I told you already, I DON'T get bloody nervous. There's more to it than that, damn it." Back to him.

"What has you so nervous?" Back to me. I felt like a freakin' tennis player.

"Tell me more about hunter nin, and maybe your quesion will answer itself." All eyes focused on him.

"Well, hunter nin are trained to track down exiled ninja, like Zabuza, and confiscate their bodies, dissecting them and destroying all evidence of any medicines used, techniques learned, etcetera. After they do all that to prevent other villages from learning their secrets, the hunter nin cut off the... Head of the exiled... Oh god..." He put his head in his hands.

"What is it, sensei?" Naruto asked.

"Haku took the body away... And the tools he used... have a very low mortality rate..."

"But he died. You confirmed it yourself, sensei." Sasuke said.

"I did, but it could have been a near-death state." He looked at me. "How did you know?"

"Know what, sensei?"

"That he wasn't dead."

"I didn't. All I knew was that I had an odd feeling." I smirked at him and stood up. "I told you I don't just get nervous." I strode out of the room.

"Sakura, get back here!" He called, but I ignored him, opting instead to go and sit on the end of the dock and watch the waves.

-------Akira POV

"Ino, go get Sakura. We need to start training."

"Yeah yeah yeah." I stood up and walked out of the room.

I figured that she wouldn't have stayed close by, so imagine my surprise when I looked down the dock and saw her sitting right on the end of it.

"Hey Forehead!" I walked toward her. "Whatcha doing?"

"Just wishing I were fishing, Piggy. Sit for a second."

"What?" I sat down.

"I've been thinking. I've become entirely too attached."

"What?"

"Remember in first grade, when I told you that we couldn't be friends because I moved all the time and I refused to make any more friends?"

"Yeah. Your point?"

"I said that because I didn't want to become attached. But I... I'm attached to Konoha."

"And?"

"And eventually we'll have to leave."

"Why dwell on that?" She looked at me like she was surprised.

"When did you become so philosophical?"

"Shut up and come with me. We have training."

"Right right." She stood up and dusted herself off. "By the way, if any of this makes it off this dock, I will strangle you into a coma."

"Whatever, let's go."

-------------------------

When we got to the area where we were going to train, Kakashi looked up and smiled. Cate frowned.

"Moron-sensei, are you sure that it's alright for you to be up and around yet?"

"Why, are you worried about me?"

"Hell yeah. If you die, who's going to train us?"

"Ah, Catie...." Fake tears ran down his face. "You are so uncaring. But yes, it's fine."

"If you say so." She folded her arms across her chest. "So, tell me what we're doing."

"Climbing trees."

"What?" Naruto asked, shocked, and even Sasuke looked weirded out.

"With no hands." Kakashi explained quickly. "In order to do that, you'll have to concentrate your chakra in the bottom of your feet. Would any of you care to explain what chakra is, for those who don't know? How about you, Catie?"

"I'll pass." She said, and he gave a look that said 'That wasn't a request'. "Oh, whatever. Chakra is the result of two energies, spiritual and physical, which are molded together. When they are molded in a particular way and concentated with hand signs, for example," She made the sign for 'ram', "you get a jutsu. Chakra can be concentrated in any part of your body and used for any number of things."

"The soles of your feet are the most difficult place in the entire body to concentrate chakra, so if you can master this, you can master any jutsu." Kakashi continued.

"In theory, of course." I said dryly, and Cate hmph-ed.

"Of course." She agreed, pushing her hair out of her face. Kakashi went on his spiel about whatver he said, I never pay attention to adults, and then threw the kunai at our feet.

"Use this to mark your progress." He said. "You may need a running start." Cate looked at me and grinned.

"Shall we?"

"Last one to the top has to wear a dress to dinner."

"You're on!" She giggled, and we waited. Finally, Kakashi said,

"Go!" and all four of us took off for the trees. I nearly tripped over Cate's shoes, and I yelled at her for it.

"Sorry! You know I'm faster barefoot!" She called back, taking her first step onto the tree. I powered ahead, trying to catch up.

3rd POV

Kakashi watched his students and Akira run up the trees. Naruto and Sasuke, as expected, didn't make it up on the first try. Sasuke overpowered his tree and broke the bark, and Naruto didn't use enough chakra.

Catie and Akira, however, looked as if they had done this before. Not well, but still... As if they had practiced. Akira appeared to have tripped over something, and Catie stopped midstep to run down and catch her friend. He saw their lips moving, and tuned his ears toward it to hear what they were saying.

"--Think that you're going to win just because you fell and I had to come save you."

"I'm going to win anyway, whether you give up your lead or not makes no difference."

"Mighty big words for a girl who fell off the damn tree." Catie smirked and landed on the ground, Akira beside her. "I'll give you another shot. Last one up has to kiss Kakashi!" They took off again up the tree, laughing and yelling the entire time. These two were rivals, too, but... Different than Sasuke and Naruto... They were friends AND rivals...

"HA HA!! I WIN I WIN I WIN!!" Akira yelled, and Cate yelled back.

"NO, YOU DIDN'T! MY MARK IS POINT FOUR CENTIMETERS AHEAD OF YOURS!"

"NOPE! YOU LOST, AND NOW YOU HAVE TO KISS KAKASHI! HA HA HA!!"

"LIES! LIES AND FRUITCAKE!!"

The branches in the top of the tree rustled, and the two girls fell out of the tree. They threw kunai and shurikun back at the tree they had just fallen from, and suddenly stopped falling, only to start swinging back toward their tree.

_Ah, tripwires... that was a rather quickly thought out plan..._

They hit the ground, both breathing heavily, when suddenly Akira jumped up.

"COME ON WE GOTTA KEEP PRACTICING!"

"See ya at the top, Akira." Cate ran off. Akira huffed.

"NOT FAIR!"

-xXx-

Cate POV

"Hey, Cate, I'm gonna go back to the house really quick and go to the bathroom." Akira said, slipping out of her perch in the junction of three big branches.

"Uh, overshare, thanks." I said, raising an eyebrow. She shrugged and leapt out of the tree. I shook my head and stretched and jumped down, and looked at the big tree.

I paced backward about thirty meters, and then ran at full speed toward the tree, trying to see how high I could go without any chakra. I soon reached the tree.

When I put my foot on it, something strange happened. I suddenly felt the weird gushing feeling that I got when I focused my chakra, and heard a weird sound, like when you apply suction to an object, and for a split second you can hear air rushing past it. I paid little attention to it, and kept running up, up, up, up to the top. When I got there, my foot slipped, and I grabbed a branch and pulled myself up onto it.

I paused, and tried to figure out how in blue fuck I had gotten all the way up here without using chakra... At least, not intentionally...

I jumped to a lower branch, and then a lower one, and then over a tree that grew at an extreme angle and slid down the trunk. I hopped to the ground, and went in search of Moron-sensei. "Moron-sensei! Where are you? We need to talk!"

"Yes we do." He said, and I turned around, jumping.

"Good God in Heaven, Kakashi, don't do that." His eye widened. "What?"

"You called me Kakashi."

"Don't get used to it. Did you see me just now?"

"Yes."

"Could you kindly tell me just what I did a minute ago?"

"I could."

"Would you please?" I asked.

"Well..." He appeared lost in thought.

-xXx-

Kakashi POV

"Would you please?" She asked, and I thought back to what I had just seen.

"Well..."

_Cate had run up the tree without focusing her chakra at all, probably just to see how high she could get without it, and I watched, interested as to what she would do when she fell. But she didn't fall._

_Despite the trouble it had recently caused me, I pulled my headband up to use my sharingan. It looked like she had focused her chakra, but I had watched her from the beginning of her experiment.... She hadn't.... Actually, it looked like the tree was reaching out to hold her on..._

"Moron-sensei. Sensei? Hello?" I was jerked out of my thoughts.

"What?" I asked as politely as I could.

"Are you going to tell me or not?" She asked, frowning. I looked down at her, and smiled, ruffling her hair.

"Nope."

"Why the bleeding hell not?"

"Because. We both know what you just did. No need to say it out loud." She frowned again and punched me in the stomach. Only because I let her, of course.

"Men." She snarled, and walked away. I stood up and brushed myself off with a chuckle.

"Genin."

-xXx-

Cate POV

I huffed and sat down.

"Cate-chan." I looked over and smirked.

"Uzumaki-chan." I patted the ground beside me. He sat down.

"Could you give me some advice about this whole tree-climbing thing?"

"Sure."

"Just don't--"

"Tell Uchiha? Perish the thought. Okay, here's what you need to do."

-----------------------

Later, as the sun was setting, I looked over from the top of the tree I was in.

"CATE!" I jumped and nearly fell out of the tree. I looked at Akira.

"You realize that you are a mere TWO FUCKING METERS AWAY, do you not?" I asked, somewhat annoyed.

"It's time to stop tree-climbing and start winding down for bed."

"Oh. Yeah." I got down from the tree and looked at Akira. "Push-ups or pull-ups?"

"Um... How about we see who can stand on her hands the longest?"

"Sure." I looked around. "Hey, Uchiha, Uzumaki! Wanna come watch us and make sure we don't cheat?"

"Hn." Uchiha said, and Uzumaki ran over.

"Cheat at what, Cate-chan?"

"You'll see." I said, and took off my jacket in favor of just my shirt. Akira was doing the same. "On your mark."

"Get set."

"Stand." We lurched back as if about to backflip across the clearing, but once we got onto our hands, we stayed there. I could feel heat flooding my face as all the blood complied with gravity and went to my head.

Suddenly, a huge gust of wind blew through and knocked us both over. But I completely and totally fell after her. When I told her, however...

"You did not!"

"Yes I did."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Let's ask them. That's what they're here for, anyway."

"Sorry, Cate-chan. I got sand in my eyes." Naruto said, looking miiighty suspect, but I chose not to call him on it.

"Uchiha?"

"Hn. Wasn't paying attention."

"And Moron-sensei isn't even here. So we have no way of knowing." I sighed.

"Yes we do. I won."

"No, I did."

"No, me."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"Yes."

"No."

"Ha, you agree with me!"

"No, I... Wait..." She paused. "Dammit."


	13. Cate's effed up dream, prt 1

OKay, chappy 13!! (its from Akira's POV in the beginning)

"talking"

_thinking_

**inner**

~X~

I watched with disgust as Uchiha and Uzumaki scarfed down their food.

"Slow down, no one's going to take your food away." Cate said.

"I can't lose to him." Sasuke growled, pausing for a moment in the stuffing of his pretty-boy face.

"I won't lose to him, either." Naruto responded. Then they both paled, and dove to the side and threw up.

"Well, at this point, the only thing you two are competing for,"

"Is who gets indigestion first." I said, biting into my roll. Kakashi stared at us. "What?" Cate and I said in unison.

"How do you two do that?" He asked, sounding amused.

"Do what, Moron-sensei?" Cate asked innocently.

"Finish each other's sentences and speak in perfect stereo." He said.

"Yeah, and the thing like during the fight with the Demon Brothers when you two started fighting like you knew the fight was coming and had practiced your plan beforehand." Naruto said, little bits of food stuck to his face. Cate wiped his face with a napkin.

"It's like you two know each other's thoughts." Said Tasuna.

"We do, most of the time, because of our years and years that we've been best friends." Cate said, leaning back in her chair, then looking over the table at me. "And it's Tazuna, by the way, Piggy-chan." I smirked.

"Now you're just showing off." I mumbled, and she stuck her tongue out at me.

"Hey, why's that picture torn?" Kakashi asked, motioning to a picture on the wall.

"That man..." Tazuna paused for a moment, his daughter, Tsunami, still doing the dishes, and Inari pouting. I decided that the gathering was entirely too tense.

"What's wrong, old man? Lost your memory?" I asked with a laugh, and he frowned at me, Tsunami only paused momentarily, Inari smiled sarcastically, and Cate stood up.

"Scuzi." She said, and left the room, leaving everyone but me confused. Delighted to at last not be the one who didn't know something, I decided to be nice and let them in on it.

"That means 'excuse me'." I told them.

-x-

Right after Tazuna finished his story that bored to me tears, Cate walked back in, pulling her chair out and sitting with her hands in her lap.

"Gratzi." She said, and I noticed that she was breathing harder than usual. I opened my mouth to mention it, but was interrupted.

"Sakura, you're sweating." Kakashi said.

"And your hair's messed up." That was Naruto.

"And you have your hands all wrapped up." I was a little surprised that Sasuke picked up on the most obvious sign, and Naruto had neglected to mention it. They all turned to me, probably expecting me to have noticed something, or to already know what had happened.

"Not to mention your breathing patteren's all screwed up." I commented, sipping my drink, and Cate rolled her eyes.

"I was just walking through the woods, minding my own business, when all of the sudden, this big dude got all up in my skittles." Suddenly interested, I leaned forward.

"What happened next?"

"Oh, I kicked him so hard that his stomach touched his spine, then I ran up the wall and super-heel-drop'ed him until his neck vanished." She shrugged and sipped her drink. "Then as I was walking back, I saw that brat, what's-his-name, Inari, sitting on the end of the dock, and we talked. Long story short, Inari now understands why Uzumaki-kun got so upset about whatever happened while I was gone."

-x-

Later that night, I was feeling the effects of the nap I had taken during Tazuna's speech earlier, and just sat in the hall, being bored and staring into the darkness.

-x-Cate POV-x-

I was disturbed from my peaceful dreams of victory in war by the call of nature, so I got up and walked down the hall.

_It's the second door on the left... _I thought to myself, and cheered mentally when I found the proper door.

After I finished my business and washed my hands, I stood in the doorway, forgetting which way was my room.

_Uh... Oh, I remember. Second door on the left._

I shut the bathroom door and turned to the left, counting doors as my fingertips brushed them, and opened the second door to the left and went inside. After I shut the door and the room was reshrouded in the perfect darkness of three in the morning, I crossed the room and laid in my bed, the one by the far wall. I was a little surprised to find it already occupied, but after feeling the other person a little with hesitent hands, I mentally calculated that, judging by the length of the legs, it was only Akira-chan getting cold and crawling into my bed, which was already warmer than hers, since I put off more body heat. I laid down with my back to her and went to sleep.

-x-

When sunlight touched my eyelids the next morning, I growled and threw my arm over my head.

"Too... Early..." Came the depressed voice of a half-woken Uzumaki-kun from the bed across the room. Wait, Uzumaki-kun? I moved my arm slightly and found myself looking at a room that was very similar to the one Akira and I occupied, except that it was strewn with boy's clothing, whereas Akira and I had our room very clean, due to an ingrained need for militarily clean surroundings. Mainly it was only me who felt the need, but still...

Uzumaki-kun chose that moment to wake up completely.

"Cate-chan? What are you doing in my room?" He asked, his voice nearly deafening in the still morning air. Wait, rewind and remix. What'd he say?

_So wait. If this isn't my room, then... This isn't my bed... So that wouldn't be Akira-chan... So therefore the arm that she put over my waist whilst dreaming of Itachi in the nightly hours isn't this one..._ My eyes narrowed. _ So who has their arm around me?_

"Uzumaki-kun... Would you be a dear and tell me whose bed this is?"

"Sure, Cate-chan! That's Sasuke's bed! Why're you in it?" I closed my eyes.

"Please Goddess if you're listening, don't let me seriously be in--"

"Cate?" I froze when I felt a rumbling in the chest of the body of the one behind me. I froze, because I suddenly realized... That's Uchiha's chest that's rumbling behind me. His voice was a little deeper than usual, and tinged with confusion over his early morning discovery. "Why're you on my bed?" I sat up slowly, thinking.

"Er... I, uh..." I racked my brain, trying my damnedest to avoid having to say those three words that I loathe so dearly. "I... I got up last night to go to the bathroom and... I guess I took a wrong turn on my way back out..." I said, thinking aloud. I put my head in my hands. "This is no good. Akira's gonna find out." I narrowed my eyes. "Let's see if we can't make this just a little less incriminating..." I stood up, my long hair brushing the skin just over the waistband of my black-and-red striped boxers, (A/N: WOOHOO MATTY BOXERS LAWLS) and walked over to Uzumaki-kun's bed and sat down on it.

**Oh yes, we just woke up with Sasuke-kun, and he had his arm around us, oh yes.**

I rolled my eyes. _You realize that he would've been very angry if it had been YOU he'd woken up to? He only didn't get pissed because he only thinks of me as one of the squad, not 'Sakura-who-has-a-crush-on-me-and-won't-shut-up'_

**Smug much?**

_The facts are in front of you, bitch._

"Cate." My eyes snapped open.

"Yeah?"

"Why would Akira care?" Sasuke asked.

"She's obsessed with me having it bad for you, for some reason." I shook my head. "One stupid daydream and she just won't let it go." I mumbled.

"Hey, Cate-chan?"

I looked up. "Yeah? What is it, Uzumaki-kun?"

"You look different than usual."

"What?"

"Well... Your hair is to your waist now, and you're not as pale." My eyes widened.

"For serious?" He nodded, and I smirked. "Now you know what I look like, well, sort of, anyhow." Akira chose that moment to bust in.

"Cate, something happened." She said, her tone urgent.

"What, like you look like you instead of just Ino with black hair?" I said flatly, and she nodded, and I stood up and walked over. "You're a little late. And... By the way... Your hair is all effed up again." She nodded and laughed.

"I know! That one chick, what her name?"

"Tsunami."

"Yeah, she asked me why I dyed my hair this way."

"And you told her..."

"That I just felt like it. Wait, you look different, or, actually, the same but... different? I'm confused..."

"I know." I reached my arms up over my head, stretching and yawning. "I have my muscle tone back, and I'm not so pale."

"I wonder if--"

"Maybe." I bent down and touched my toes. "Whatever the case may be, I can't let anyone else know. Nor can you." I said sternly as her face lit up.

"Spoilsport."

"Meh." I shrugged.

"Hey, why did I find you in here?"

"I took a wrong turn last night coming out of the bathroom and woke up in here."

"Yeah, in--" Naruto began.

"Don't help." I interrupted, and Akira shrugged, excited by having her hair back in black and white, and left.

"Does she...?"

"Dye her hair like that? Kind of. It's not much dying it as bleaching it." Naruto left to go to breakfast, and I was headed out myself to go into the woods to train some more, when I felt a tugging on my wrist. I looked down at it, and then up at the owner of the hand. "What?"

"I wanted to tell you something, away from prying ears. And Naruto, of course."

"And what would that be?" He didn't answer at first, and I sighed. "Uchiha, unless it's important, could you let go of my arm? I need to go do my warm-ups before breakfast."

"I was wondering if you'd like to train sometime."

"I train all the time, Uchiha. Make your point."

"... Could I train with you today?" I smirked.

"If you honestly think you can handle it." I said, and pulled my arm away from his grasp. "See you later, Uchiha." With that, I left.

-x-Sasuke POV-x-

I stood there, puzzled. Not only did I sound like Sakura sounded before Cate came along, what did Cate mean by 'If you honestly think you can handle it'?

_I've lost it._ I concluded. _..._

_But I will train with her today._

As I got dressed, I couldn't help but remember waking up with my arm around her, the way she looked in just boxers and a tank top,

**Whose boxers are they?**

and that night when she looked just like me, but shorter and with green eyes and long hair.

-x-

After I finished breakfast, I went outside, expecting to be alone except for Naruto and Kakashi, since the girls both mastered the exercise yesterday. So when I heard a singing voice that seemed familiar, I was puzzled again. But I didn't show it, l of course.

"_You and I in a little toy shop  
Buy a bag of balloons with the money we've got." _I looked around the trunk of a tree and saw Cate sitting on the ground and reaching for her feet. I was vaguely amazed that she could bend in half like that.

"_Set them free at the break of dawn  
'Til one by one, they were gone.  
Back at base, bugs in the software." _She stood up and walked over to a tree and jumped up, grabbing a branch, then started doing chin-ups.

_"Flash the message, Something's out there.  
Floating in the summer sky.  
99 red balloons go by." _She dropped down from the branch, sighing happily, before removing her jacket and lifting the hem of her shirt. Unconsciously, I held my breath. Suddenly, she smirked. "Enjoying the show, Uchiha?"

"..." I stepped out from behind the tree. "How'd you know?"

"I would've heard Uzumaki-kun, and both Akira-chan and Kakashi-sensei would have let me know they were here, out of courtesy. Of course, when I get the feeling that I'm being watched, people get hurt, so that may have something to do with it." She shrugged. "Still want to train with me?"

"Hn." I said, but she seemed to understand.

"Fine by me. First, you'll have to get loosened up. So we'll start out with basic stretches."

-x-Cate POV-x-

Anyone I knew closely would have known the gleam in my eyes was beyond my normal desire to get to tell someone what to do. This gleam was one caused small children to cry, teenagers to leave, and adults to worry. This gleam was generally caused by the desire to make someone suffer. Right now, it was caused by the sight of Uchiha Sasuke sweating and breathing heavily. I smirked at the obvious effort he was expending for the mere act of standing.

After we had stretched, I did right- and left-handed one-arm push-ups, right- and left-handed one-arm pull-ups, weight-lifting, lunges, high-kicks, swimming against the current of the river, tree-climbing, handstand push-ups, back bends, sit-ups, crunches, running up trees with me on his back, holding breath for long periods of time, punching rocks, arm-wrestling, static chairs, cross-country running, and any other thing I thought of. Then, we stopped for lunch.

"Uchiha, make the fire." I told him, stripping the limbs from a branch I had found on the ground with a kunai and examining it, testing whether it would break easily.

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to catch some fish for lunch." With that, I left.

-x-

I sat on the bank of the small river, took off my sandles, rolled up my pants, and put my feet in the water. After I had myself comfortably situated, I pulled out a spool of tripwire and a hook that I had bought from someone in the village, on the condition that I had to take something to his daughter in Konoha. Since that's where I would be, sooner or later, I had agreed, and taken both the item and the hook. Now, I dug in the soil next to me until I found a worm and speared it.

"I'm sorry, little earthworm..." I whispered, then dropped the line in the water. "Ah, now this is life." I said.

"Fire's ready." Uchiha said, crouching beside me. It grew silent.

Eventually, I caught a fish and pulled it in, revealing that it was a big one.

"Oh, of course, you evil little meatwad." I growled at the fish. "You couldn't get caught with Saiden around, could you? No, you have to wait until it's just me and Uchiha, who doesn't give a shit about whether my fish is bigger." I sighed and shook my head, before looking over at Uchiha. "Gut it and eat it."

"Not hungry?"

"No."

"Hn." He left, and I leaned back, looking up at the sky through the screen of leaves.

"It's such a beautiful day..." I murmured.

-x-

"...And then this pervert comes up behind me, right, and tries to grab my butt, so I spun around and gave him an up-close-and-personal view of the bottom of my shoe." Akira said animatedly.

"Nice." I said, and high-fived her.

"I went through hell today..." Uchiha mumbled.

"What was that, Uchiha?" I asked, although I knew exactly what he had said. He glanced at me, and I smirked sadistically behind my cup. He was the only one who saw my evil look.

"Hn." He went back to eating, and I shrugged.

"Meh." I could practically feel everyone looking between the two of us. "He decided to train with me today." I said airily, and Akira snorted, then started choking on her spit. I whacked her on the back, and she cleared her throat.

"You know, that doesn't really help someone who's choking."

"I know." I said, ruffling her hair. She rolled her eyes, then suddenly remembered why she had been choking in the first place. I know, because she started laughing.

"He," She pointed at Uchiha, "was training with you?" I nodded. "Oh, that's just great." She pounded on the table with her fist as she tried to calm down so that she talk again. I smirked, finding it quite amusing myself.

"Your face is turning purple." I said, shooting a glance at the others, wondering vaguely how they were reacting. Uchiha looked annoyed, Moron-sensei looked amused at us all, and the others were just listening to our conversation.

"So, Forehead, how did you train today?"

"I stretched, did one-arm push-ups and pull-ups, crunches, sit-ups, lunges, backbends, swimming, handstand push-ups, high-kicks, anything I thought of, really." I said. "He took longer to exhaust than I had originally given him credit for. I wasn't expecting him to get much past ten o'clock." I said, reluctantly amazed by his perseverence.

"What a persistant little pretty boy." Akira said, giving him a glance.

"But he was still panting like a greyhound after the big race by lunch, so I made him build the fire while I got to sit and fish." I said.

"Sadistic bitch."

"Sadomasochist, really, I was aching all over by the time we came in." I said, and she frowned.

"Lucky bitch, then. I was just irritated when I got in."

"That's what you get to do tomorrow, when it's my turn to watch the bridge-builder."

"I'm not staying here while you get to run about with.... Where's Naruto?"

"I'll go get him!" I cheered.

"I'll go with you." Uchiha said, standing slowly. I quirked an eyebrow.

"Guess he didn't learn his lesson." Akira murmured, and I shrugged.

"Whatever. Let's just go get him, yes?"

-x-

"Uzumaki-kun! Where are you?" I called, looking around. Uchiha walked beside me silently, and I decided that Uzumaki wasn't going to be making noise anytime soon. So I dropped to the ground and crawled forward on all fours. Uchiha started to come after me, but I motioned for him to be very still and not make any noise. I held my breath and silently prayed that this would work. I tried searching the woods for Uzumaki-kun's presence, wondering if perhaps it was his chakra I had felt so many times in the past. If nothing else, the strong scent of old ramen on the breeze should give me some idea where he is.

Suddenly, a strong gust of wind blew through, and I caught the scent of, you guessed it, really old, really stale ramen. I launched to my feet and ran toward the smell. Uchiha, presumably, followed. All I know is I found my dear little 'brother' lying under a tree, snoring away. I let out a brief laugh, and then picked him up. I turned around and carried him back to the house, Uchiha still not talking or helping in any way. I kind of wondered why he'd even bothered coming with me.

-x-

After we got back, I tucked Uzumaki into bed, and kissed his forehead, before waving good night to Moron-sensei and going to bed.

I changed back into my shorts-and-a-tank-top outfit that I wore for sleeping, and crawled into bed.

_"Hey, Cate." I sighed, irritated, and rolled over to face the wall. The bed sank down behind me, and I heard the door open. I was poked. "Give it up, Pretty Boy. If she didn't say g'night to me, she won't say it to you." Akira's voice, strangely, was now by the door, when just moments before it had come from right in front of me, or what had been in front of me before I rolled over._

_"Cate..." I was interested as to why Uchiha was suddenly the one by my bedside, and why he kept poking me. "Ca-ate..." He dragged my name into two seperate syllables. I just ignored whoever was behind me._

_Now, here's what I had gathered on the situation so far:_

_1. Kira-chan poked me and tried to get my attention, and then I rolled over._

_2. Right after, Akira was suddenly at the door, and Uchiha started poking me._

_3. Right now, he was acting a lot like Akira, i.e., poking me and repeating my name._

_So now maybe it's clearer why I wasn't entirely sure who was behind me. It could be Akira. It could be a clone. It could be Uzumaki-kun, who only acted like he was passed out. It could even turn out to be Moron-sensei, who had been brought into Akira's shenanigans._

_"Ca-a-a-tie..." _

~X~

Bells-- Im tired. it's 1:36. i wrote all this in one sitting, more or less. Im proud of myself. Thats two chappies in one day. 12 and this, that i had ready to post today. (I count it as one day since i havnt gone to bed yet but if you want to get technical than--)

cate-- I'll just be taking her to bed now cuz she's exhausted.


	14. Cate's effed up dream, prt 2

okay, this is really just the second part of what was originally chappy 13, which i thought had gotten too long.

"talking"

_thinking_

**inner**

~X~

_"Ca-a-a-tie..." He/she/it persisted in all that blasted poking._

_"Go-o awa-ay." I mumbled, mocking the way he/she/it said my name._

_"But, Cate...." He/she/it leaned down and laid his/her/its hand on my shoulder, and spoke in my ear. "I don't want to. You haven't given me my good night kisses yet." I had to stifle my laughter._

_"Kisses? Plural? My, but aren't we cocky." I said, still facing away. "And I couldn't care less what you want. Go away, before you lose something important." He/she/it chuckled in my ear. _

_"Silly Cate. I don't care if you care. I will get my kisses. Now turn over, woman." I rolled my eyes and pushed him/her/it off the bed, then curled up more, sliding my hand under the pillow to grab hold of the kunai I had hidden under there. Surprisingly, it was not there._

_"Can I have my kisses now that you have no weapons?" He/she/it asked, twirling the kunai around his/her/its finger._

_"No. Get away from me before I throw your ass out the window and your head takes the door." I said, angry now. I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I was pulled onto my back roughly, and found myself staring into the face of Uchiha-who-acted-like-Kira-chan._

_"There's no real threat here. Just words." He/she/it smiled. "Now I'm willing to leave if you give me just one kiss. But I want at least that." He/she/it said sternly, and I rolled my eyes and sighed._

_"Fine. But only one, okay?" I said softly, trying to look as submissive as possible, and hating every minute of it. The only way I could stand it was knowing that he/she/it was completely misled and I would soon throw him/her/it out the window. I reached up, trailing my fingertips over his/her/its cheek, and he/she/it leaned down. Suddenly, my fingers found hair, and I pulled as hard as I could and jumped to my feet and threw the person/clone out the window. I growled territorily and turned back to the bed._

_Just as I got back to being comfy..._

_"Ca-a-a-tie..."_

I shot up in bed. "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!" I gasped, looking around. _Chest heaving... Room dark... Heart pounding... Massive headache.... Desire to break something strangely not present.... Yeah, I had a nightmare..._

"Cate? Whass wrong?" Kira-chan asked sleepily, and I sighed.

"Nothing."

"Didn't sound like nothing." Came a voice from the corner, and I jumped a little, before scooting backward on the bed until my back was firmly pressed to the wall.

"Just a strange dream." I said, leaning my head back against the wall.

"It sounded like you were being murdered." Came a different voice, from a different corner.

"Or at least like you were getting felt up in your sleep." replied the first voice.

"In your dreams, Moron-sensei."

"How mean." He pouted. I sighed, when suddenly, something fell on me.

"Cate-chan... You worried me." Uzumaki whimpered, wrapping his arms around my neck, and I stroked his back soothingly.

"No need to worry. I'm here, no one got killed, and we're all safe." I said softly.

"...My mom says that." Akira said softly, clearly getting home-sick.

"Where do you think I got it from? Geez."

"Why're you in such a mood?"

"I'm just pissed. I normally don't react that way to bad dreams."

"Bad dreams?" Kakashi repeated, and the blood drained from my face.

"I meant strange dreams, of course." I said, trying to diffuse the damage. To no avail, of course. I felt another person sit on the bed and crawl over next to me.

"Aw, poor little Catie. Did you have a scary dream? Do you need a hug to make it all better?"

"You wish, pervert." I said, but hugged Uzumaki-kun tighter for a split-second. He had fallen asleep, and was probably drooling on me, but he probably got so little peaceful sleep, what with him being so tense and wound up all the time, that I decided to let him sleep. I started massaging his neck, and was so amazed at the size of the knots that I paused for a moment.

"So what was it about?" Asked the last voice, the only one that I was a little tired of, to be honest.

"None of your business. Just Akira-chan fucking with my head, as usual." I told him sharply.

"Was Sasuke in it or something?" Kira-chan asked.

"Why do you ask?"

"You're awfully defensive."

"Hmph."

"Oh great. Another one who speaks 'Uchiha-ese'." Akira said, and I could tell that she was rolling her eyes.

"Like you don't speak it, too?" I pointed out.

"Not the point."

"Hey, question. How did you boys get in here, anyway?"

"The door wasn't locked, Catie."

"I mean so fast. Were you, perhaps, already in here?"

"Of course not. But maybe we should all be in the same room anyway. You two act like enough like boys that it really doesn't matter."

"Oh, how the neighbors will talk." I sighed.

-x-

When I woke up the next morning, it was later than usual, and I knew the reason as soon as I opened my eyes. Akira had covered all the windows so that no light got in. But one of the covers had slipped off the window, and now light was slowly reclaiming the room. Judging by the amount of light, it wasn't much later than usual, so it made little difference. After all that, I noticed my immediate surroundings. Uzumaki was asleep on my lap, with his head on my shoulder. My arms were around him, cradling him like a baby. I looked to my left, and saw that Moron-sensei was sitting next to me, so I had probably fallen asleep on his shoulder. Uchiha was not in my line of sight, so I just shrugged and settled for waking up my... bedmates... God, that sounds so wrong...

"Uzumaki-kun... Wake up, honey..." I said, touching his shoulder. He woke up slowly, his eyes widening when he found himself lying on my chest. He jumped up,

"Sorry, Cate-cha-- AAH!" And fell down, having tripped over Moron-sensei's foot. His yell woke up the Copy Nin.

"Hmm? What happened?"

"You boys invaded the room and then crawled into bed with me, and fell asleep all over me." I said. I stood up and stretched, stiff from falling asleep while upright. "Ah, shit... I need a bubble bath." I heard a low chuckle and then felt a hand rest on my shoulder.

"Aw, does the little girl need to be pampered?" I elbowed him in the gut only, I presume, because he let me. Such is the way of shinobi.

"I'm just tense, is all. From my night of sleeping in an upright position, you know."

"I'm sorry, Catie." He said, and kissed the top of my head, ruffled my hair, and left the room. I shook my head, rubbing my back.

"Men." I grumbled as I went to take a shower.

-x-

The next morning, I was taking a walk, vaguely looking for Uzumaki-kun, when I suddenly bumped into Haku.

"Hello." I said, minimum politeness, and then tried to go on, but I felt my wrist get caught. Again. "What?"

"I was wondering, did it hurt?" He/she asked me. I was sort of depressed, and wanted to get hit on for the ego boost, so I asked...

"What?"

"When you fell from that tree a couple of days ago." He/she clarified. Oh.

"I don't even remember that."

"Amnesia?"

"No, I just get injured so often that unless I'm close to death and or bleeding, I hardly notice." I replied.

"That's no good. A young woman shouldn't get hurt that often." He/she said reprovingly, and held his/her hand out. I looked down at it, then at Haku. Finally, hesitently, I laid my hand in his/hers. He/she lifted it and examined the back of it closely, with my luck, looking at a very dangerous blood clot that would make me shrivel but wouldn't be life-threatening.

"I want to die." I mumbled, depressed beyond reason, and Haku looked horrified.

"Why?"

"I'm exhausted, I'm depressed, I'm alone, I'm in pain, and I'm irrational." I said, hanging my head. He/she lifted my head and looked deeply into my eyes, as if trying to look into my mind. Then, surprisingly, he/she hugged me tightly, proving that he's a he, kissed my cheek, and then walked off. I watched in shock, one hand rising to touch my cheek.

_What the... Who the hell does he think he is? No one hugs Catherine Fuji and gets away with it!_

**Check again, bitch, because the cute Mist Nin is getting away with it.**

_Shove it, Inner Bitch._

"Hey you!" I called, but to no avail, because he didn't look back.

"Cate-chan!" I turned, braid whipping around, and saw Uzumaki running up and Uchiha following closely behind.

"Did you guys see that... That guy who just h-hugged me?" I said, so surprised that my voice squeaked on the word 'hugged'.

"No."

-x-

That day passed in a blur, with much training and eating and competition amongst the others and much confusion with me. I went through my day mechanically, trying to figure out just what the hell was going on with me. And, evidently, Inner Sakura has a thing for random signs of affection, because Uchiha's arm over me as I woke up that morning, and Naruto's constant hugging, and Kakashi's hair-ruffling and head-kissing, and waking up yesterday with my head on his shoulder, and Haku that morning and his random hug-kiss-and-escape kept playing in my head.

"Goddammit." I said angrily as the sun went down, and my hand went through the rotted wood I had punched. Suddenly, I stopped, and ran up a path and to a cliff-edge that over-looked the ocean and had a guard rail. "Oh, wow..."

Akira looked at me.

"What?"

"Look at this!"

She stood and walked over, leaning heavily against the rail.

"Fascinating." She said sarcastically. "This is why you came out here so late?"

"Yes."

"For the sunset? I thought you were above this kind of girliness."

"Not for the sunset, for the reflection it makes on the water. See the way it's all red over by the horizon? It looks like the sun is bleeding out." I told her, captivated by the scene before me. She just shook her head.

"You're whacked, and I'm going back to the house and getting some food." She told me.

"You'll regret this, Akira-chan, when I start training with Lee because you don't appreciate a good sunset." I said. "I'll bring Uzumaki tomorrow."

-x-

I yawned widely.

"Geeziu, I'm tired." I said.

"That's what you get." Akira told me. I stuck my tongue out at her.

"For what?" Kakashi asked.

"For staying up to watch the sunset on the ocean." I replied, daring him to say anything. We arrived at the bridge, and discovered that half the people from yesterday had quit. Sasuke 'hn'ed, and we seperated. I went straight to the eastern side of the bridge, and watched the sun begin its daily death march.

"Watching the sun rise?" Uchiha asked, coming to stand beside me.

"No. Watching the sun's reflection on the water. The sun, in and of itself, does not concern me."

"So, what is it about the sunrise and sunset that interests you?" He asked.

"I like the way the water sparkles. It almost gives me hope that things won't turn out the way I think they will." I said quietly, hands gripping the rails, and I could hear a minute sadness. "Eh heh, that came out wrong..." I said, stepping back and letting go of the rail. He turned and looked at me. I gasped. The sunlight somehow lit up his hair and eyes, making him look ethereal.

"What is it, Cate?" The simple question, spoken in his deep voice, broke my preoccupation.

"What?" I asked, having missed the question.

"Why are you staring like that?"

"Nothing, just... the sun makes your hair, uh, blue, and your eyes sparkly. You looked... strange... for a moment." I told him. He frowned, but turned back to the sunrise. I followed his example.

_What the hell was that about? Am I having 'special' thoughts about UCHIHA?!?!_ I asked myself, crossing my arms across my chest and gripping the rails again, leaning down so that it wasn't a stretch. I stared impassively out over the water, I know, because Uchiha didn't say another word. Inside, I was screaming as loud as I could.

"Cate."

I jolted from my daydream.

"Huh? What?" I asked.

"I was wondering if you were going to be watching the sunset tonight." He asked.

"Yeah, obviously."

"Hm." He turned back to the sun, and I shook my head.

"Weirdo Uchiha..." I mumbled.

"Can we please get to the worksite now?" Tazuna called, and I sprang up from my place.

"Right, right. Coming!" I called, and ran to catch up.

When we got to the worksite, I swallowed. "That's... a lot of... Blood..."

The quiet statement seemed to trigger a haunting laugh that filled the air.

"I'm so glad you think so, little girl."

~X~

sasuke--...//// my eyes are sparkly

naruto--hah! sasuke, you said I'd never sleep with a girl, and I did just that!

Sasuke-- stupid, i meant sleep with as in--

cate-- *punches sasuke* shut up

kakashi-- aw, catie...

cate-- is that your favorite line, or something?

bells-- this chappy is all effed up (HA HA THATS THE THIRD HAH HAH HAH CUZ I CUT THE LAST ONE IN TWO PIECES)

cate-- ALL OF YOU GO TO BED, DAMMIT.

all assembled-- gnight, cate *kiss*

cate--*super-angry-kill mode engaged* RAWR!!! D:

haku-- please read and review.


	15. a battle ensues, cate swears revenge

See former chapters for disclaimer.

~X~

_"I'm so glad you think so, little girl."_

_~X~_

My eye twitched. Why does everyone just see me as a little girl? At first, it was only Moron-sensei, then the bridgebuilder, now this bastard. I couldn't help what I said next. It snuck out, I swear.

"DON'T CALL ME A LITTLE GIRL, YOU FUCKING SHARK-FACED PEDOPHILIC MURDER-OBSESSED MUMMY-HEADED MORON-SENSEI WANNABE BASTARD!" I yelled.

"YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS THAT WE, AS GENIN, ARE AT LEAST ONE THOUSAND TIMES AWESOMER THAN YOU!" Akira continued, voicing the last of my thought, which was more suited to her anyway.

"Is that so?" He asked, suddenly in front of us, Haku beside him.

"Oh my god!" Uzumaki-kun yelled. "It's that Haku kid!" I rolled my eyes, which then fixed on Haku. I growled low in my throat.

"Sakura?" I heard Tazuna say, but I ignored him, choosing instead to glare accusingly at Haku.

"Do I know you?" He asked, looking at me curiously.

"Damn fucking right you do."

"Your face and voice ring a faint bell." He said, trying remember now. At least, I think so...

"Maybe this will help you out here..." I frowned and sighed heavily. "I'm exhausted, I'm depressed, I'm alone, I'm in pain, and I'm irrational."

His eyes, presumably, widened. "Oh lord."

"Yeah, you bastard. No one does that to me and gets away with it." I pulled out a kunai. "You're gonna feel pain today, bitch."

"Language, little girl." Zabuza said.

"Shut up, Mr. Compensating-For-Something." I said, stifling a laugh. I noticed that Haku stifled one, too. "See? Your little gay lover over there agrees." Then, Haku stopped laughing. In my anger, I couldn't help myself from adding this next part. "Or maybe, secretly, Haku there is really... a GIRL!"

That did it. Haku growled and, suddenly, was in front of me. I blinked, and heard the clash of steel and steel. When I opened my eyes again, Uchiha was standing in front of me, blocking Haku's senbon, which were steel, evidently.

"Cate, come HERE!" Akira said, dragging me away by the wrist.

"What just happened? I blinked and then Uchiha was there." I whispered to her, confused.

"He got all pissed about something, and his Sharingan activated, and then he was over there. Heh, maybe he's protecting someone precious to him." Akira chuckled. I paused.

"Who?"

"What?"

"Who's he protecting?" I asked, and she stared at me.

"Cate..." She shook her head irritably. "You're a military prodigy, and your strategies are so far infallible."

"Thank you."

"But you're such a dolt about some things." She walked away. I went after her.

"Hey, what are you talking about?"

"Nothing."

"Fine, be that way." I said, crossing my arms and turning to the two battles going on. "Their battle, so far, is just for the two of them, so I'll stay here and protect the old man." I said, moving in front of Tazuna. "Stay behind me."

"Finally going to do as ordered, eh?" Tazuna joked, and I smirked.

"And keep your mouth shut." I said. Just then, Uzumaki-kun showed up.

"Here I am, to save the day! You all know how the story goes! Things look bleak, until the hero arrives! Then, -POW- bye bye bad guys." I hung my head, disbelieving, then looked up sharply when Zabuza threw shurikun at Uzumaki-kun.

Which were blocked by Haku's senbon.

"Haku, what are you doing?" Zabuza asked.

"Zabuza, sir, please let me have this boy. I want to fight him my own way..."

"So you want me to keep my hands off him? How charmingly naive of you. As usual." I snorted.

_God, they both sound so gay._

**But you know for sure that Haku, for one, isn't.**

_I know no such thing. I've been mistaken for a boy before, and that's when I'm not trapped in a flat-chested body._

**Bitch.**

_Oh ho ho, is that your best shot?_

I saw Uzumaki sneak over and jump into Haku's jutsu. I sighed, and closed my eyes, silently praying for them, before focusing on the battle before me.

After Zabuza's demonstration of hunting by sound alone, I was antsy enough to feed an aardvark for a week. I looked around, and pulled Kira-chan over. "Stay here," I whispered, "And help Moron-sensei take care of this idiot."

"Where are you going?"

"I have to go check on my boys." I said, and got as low to the ground as I could get, before moving quickly toward Haku's mirrors. I rolled under just in time to see Uchiha push Uzumaki-kun to the side and avoid a barrage of senbon. I crawled over and tapped his shoulder.

"Hu- Oh, it's you." Uchiha looked me over.

"If I didn't know better, U-chi-ha, I'd say you're less than glad to see me."

"..."

"I'll ignore that one. So, have you been bleeding?" I asked, looking around.

"You ask strange questions."

"It hides my true purpose." I told him, then turned my attention to Uchiha. "Do you think you could activate your Sharingan?" I asked him.

"...Probably, if I had a good enough reason."

"I told you to do so. That a good enough reason for you?"

"No."

"Hm. Then how about because I said please?" He sighed.

"Cate, I can't just do that without someone's life getting threatened." He told me, and I opened my mouth, but decided against my next comment.

"Well, Uchiha, your team's lives are all at stake here. Do you think you could do it, within the next few minutes, perhaps?"

"Yes."

"Thank you. You're an asset to squad 7." I said, patting his hand, then took my shirt off.

"What're you doing?"

"First aid." I said, tearing my shirt into strips and bandaging his wounds.

"You just... Your shirt... Took off your..." He fell silent, unable to keep talking.

"Uchiha, let me know when you've grown up and gotten over your childish surprise at a shirtless teammate." I said, patting his head, and turned to see that Haku had paused in whatever he had been doing. "Oh, come on, you babies, grow up!" I snarled. Haku shrugged.

"As you wish." He said, and suddenly I was surrounded by him. His reflection, anyway. A shadow fell over me, and I looked up to see Uchiha standing in front of me.

"I'll handle him. You take care of Naruto."

"Can do." I said, and turned to my blond companion. "Uzumaki-kun?" He stood up and moved to be beside Uchiha.

"I'll protect you, Cate-chan." I sighed and put my head in my hands.

"Stupid machismo... You boys realize that I'm not just gonna sit here and-"

"That's exactly what you're going to do." Uchiha said, and I scowled. I don't like being interrupted.

"Because we're gonna protect you, believe it!" So I sighed and gave in.

I sat there in the corner of the mirrored prison, and watched my friends fight for me. It drove me psycho to be stuck in this corner, but this was a battle for those with the abilities necessary to win it.

I saw Uchiha fall, saw Uzumaki-kun lose control, and while he beat the crap out of Haku, I started trying to save Uchiha.

I reached into my shurikun pouch and pulled out the bandages and hydrogen peroxide, set them on the ground beside me, and sat him up. I pulled the senbon out of his back and his chest, and then took his shirt off of him.

**Whoo-hoo! Sasuke-kun is SHIRTLESS!**

_Shut up. I need my concentration if I am to save him. Or, do you not care if he dies?_

Like I had expected, there was only silence. I wiped his wounds off with peroxide to check for infection. Thankfully, Haku's weapons were clean, and there was no infection. I wrapped the bandages around him, covering the wounds, before turning to his neck.

_This is where it gets complicated. If I do this part wrong, he'll bleed out and die. Or, wait... Did Haku hit the major artery? _I felt his neck for a pulse, and found that none of the senbon had pierced it. _Oh, gee, Cate, way to over-react. Haku wasn't trying to kill._ I sat back and sighed, then leaned Uchiha forward and pulled the senbon out of his neck. His eyes opened slowly as I wrapped a bandage around his neck.

"C-Cate?" His voice was raspy, as if it hurt to talk.

"No worries, Uchiha. I may not look like much, but I'm a pro at pretending to be a doctor." I said, checking his legs. I was shocked when I heard what sound like a faint laugh. Uchiha was... Laughing? "Are you...Delirious?" I asked, rather than the rather stupid 'Are you feeling alright?'

"That's... Just like you... Cate..." I scowled at him, and whacked him on the head. "Ow, what?"

"I thought something was really wrong, you idiot." I told him, then hit him again. "And that's for interrupting me earlier." He frowned.

"Where's Naruto?"

"Uzumaki-kun is fighting Haku." We looked up just in time to see Haku's mask come off. Uzumaki-kun stopped, hesitated, and his body slumped as all the fight left him in a hurry.

"It's... You..." Haku tensed.

"I am sorry, Naruto-kun, but you cannot kill me." Then he disappeared. I knew where he was going, and was already running toward Moron-sensei and Zabuza. I got there in time to see Haku materialize, and knock into him, pushing him out of the way of Moron-sensei's Raikiri, which brushed against my ankle, making me wince, just before it drilled into Zabuza's chest. Unconsciously, I was holding my breath, which I noticed after Zabuza's body dissolved into water. I looked when I felt Haku shifting.

"...Cate... Is that what Naruto-kun called you? Might I ask why you're lying on me?" I growled at him, and punched him, rather hard, in the face, knocking him unconscious.

Zabuza's fight with Moron-sensei went on for a short while longer, but not very long, since Moron-sensei hadn't lost as much blood, before Gatou showed up. He said some things, and then Zabuza was getting attacked and lost the use of his arms. He then got tossed a kunai and went on a rampage, killing a bunch of the hitmen before he made it to his goal, which was cutting off Gatou's head.

Finally, I was told to get off of Haku, where I had been sitting this entire time, so that if he woke up, I could knock him out again. Zabuza was laid next to Haku, and as if it had been planned, Haku woke up at that moment, and stared at his father-figure in horror.

"No... No no no no..." He crawled over to Zabuza and laid a hand on his chest. "Zabuza-san? Answer me, Zabuza-san... Zabuza-san?"

"Haku... Live your life right... Don't be like me..."

"We'll live that way together, as a father and son..." Haku pressed, eyes starting to tear.

"No, Haku. I'm dying, and I won't live to see the sun set." He said, his voice faded with each passing word. "Don't cry for me, Haku... I've been living on... Borrowed time..."

"No no no, Zabuza-san, you can't... Please don't... Don't leave me... Alone again..."

"It's cliche, but... I'll always... be with..." His eyes closed, and the last sentence Zabuza Momochi ever uttered went forever unfinished. Haku threw himself on his adoptive dad's chest and sobbed.

-x-

That evening on the bridge, Kira-chan and I burned candles and burnt incense for all the departed souls, and at one point, I thought I saw Haku, but I couldn't tell for sure. I thought for a moment, and bowed my head one more time, figuring that, as long as I was bein' all spiritual, I should go all out. So I offered a prayer for the lost soul who had been orphaned twice in one life.

-x-

"We're going to name it the Great Naruto Bridge." Tazuna said proudly, and my eyebrow quirked.

"Not the Great Shinobi Bridge, or the Bridge of Dreams, or..." I grumbled, miffed that after all I had done for the miserable stinking idiots, I wasn't even getting a thanks, since, hey, that's my job, but fucking Uzumaki-kun gets a whole fucking BRIDGE named after him... I shook my head, and stretched, tense after staying in my place for so long. But hey, Uzumaki-kun's never been good at quick goodbyes, especially after all he's done in one place. So I crossed my arms and waited.

"So, Inari, you have to grow up quick, and don't cry." Uzumaki-kun said, patting Inari on the head, his eyes all watery and stuff, since he was crying. Inari, also holding back tears, responded with,

"Of course not! It's you who shouldn't cry." I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"It''s okay to cry, you idiots. There's not a mission on right now." They both came back with,

"I'M NOT CRYING!" I shook my head.

"Idiot Duo, over here." I mumbled.

"Oh, and Sakura?" I looked over at Tazuna.

"What's up, old man?"

"We got a new volunteer to help get the trading started yesterday."

"I'm trying to think of a polite way to ask why you seem to think I should care."

"He's been wanting to see you, but you always seem to be training."

"Now, who could that be?" I tried to think of any boys who'd flirted with me recently, but the only thing I could come up with was-

"Hello, Cherry Blossom." I felt a tic in my eye beginning to develop with all the twitching it had been doing recently.

"Oh, Cherry Blossom, nice, because I've only heard that one thirty-three million times before." I said, turning to Haku, who just chuckled. I noticed that he had his hands behind his back and his feet were shoulder-length apart. As if he were attempting to look non-threatening. I made no such attempt.

"So, I was wondering if it hurt." Ah, the tic is back.

"What?" I said, although I suspected that I was going to be surprised.

"When you ran into me yesterday. I would think that it would, since we were both going very fast."

"But in the same direction, so it didn't hurt as much as I had anticipated." I replied matter-of-factly, and snorted when I noticed Akira standing back a few meters, gaping. I know for a fact she'd have hit him by now, and she expected me to be just as violent as she when it came to the opposite sex. "Oh, and I have a question myself."

"Ask away."

"Did it hurt?"

"What?" He asked, a faint smile on his face. He knew what to expect, because all I had done was switched our parts.

"When I ran into you and knocked you to the ground."

"No, but it hurt when you hit me in the face. My nose is still throbbing." I patted his head.

"Poor little Mist nin. You got hit by a little girl and now your little nosy hurts." I said, baby-talking him the way Moron-sensei kept doing to me. Really, it's damn irritating to hear, so I decided to pass on the misery. He lifted my chin, as if trying to read my mind through my eyes.

_Now why does this seem familiar?_

Then he pulled me into a very tight hug, and I suddenly remembered what came next. But before I could do a thing about it, he kissed my cheek again and then disappeared into a puff of mist, a faint chuckle evident in the still air. My tic returned with a vengence, and I started waving my arms around angrily, and swearing loudly and violently about 'that damned mist nin is gonna get it' and 'no one kisses me and gets away with it' and 'he's gonna pay the next time we see each other' and 'I never forget a grudge'.

~X~

Alright, that takes care of that... YAY CUZ WE'RE ALL EXCITED

cate-... if that goddamned Mist Nin kisses me again, i'm gonna rip his **BIG-TIME CENSORED EVEN I DONT KNOW WHAT CATE IS SAYING BUT JUDGING BY THE HAND MOTIONS SHES MAKING, IT'S NOT PRETTY**

haku- eh heh heh... -_-; please read and review please


	16. the ending so soon?

**NEW CHAPPY NEW CHAPPIE NEW CHAPPY IF YOU WANT A DISCLAIMER SEE ONE OF THE MANY CHAPPYS THAT PRECEDE THIS ONE**

_Then he pulled me into a very tight hug, and I suddenly remember what came next. But before I could do a thing about it, he kissed my cheek again and then disappeared into a puff of mist, a faint chuckle evident in the still air. My tic returned with a vengence, and I started waving my arms around angrily, and swearing loudly and violently about 'that damned mist nin is gonna get it' and 'no one kisses me and gets away with it' and 'he's gonna pay the next time we see each other' and 'I never forget a grudge'._

~X~

We walked for what seemed like days, and Kira-chan and I stood in the back of the group, playing whatever twisted game she made up. They were mainly variations on drinking games. The one we played now was called 'I never...' and everytime I said something she'd done, she had to carry me for about five minutes, and vice-versa.

"I've never kissed a boy before." She said, and I scoffed.

"I've never-"

"Nope, you kissed Naruto's forehead that one time."

"Oh, right..." I crouched down and she crawled onto my back, and I thought about how I would get her back. After she got down, I smirked. "Aha, I've never been in love with an Uchiha." She scowled, but crouched, and I hopped onto her back. "Heh heh. Success."

"Aw, shut up, I'll get you next time."

"Ah, but I think not, my dear sister."

"Why?"

"Because. You see those gates up there?" She looked and nodded. "Those are the Konoha gates. We're home now. By the time I have to get down, we'll be there, and we can stop playing."

"Damn."

"Heh."

"Ladies, could you please catch up to the rest of the group?"

"Why, Moron-sensei?" I asked.

"Because ninja have come for you before, and I don't want you two to get abducted."

"Aw, he cares." I said, and Akira jogged forward to catch the group.

"Oh, and it's been five minutes." He said, and I hopped down, just as we reached the gate. Akira scowled, but then shrugged and ran off. I tried to go off after her, but Moron-sensei put a hand on my shoulder. "Catie, we need to talk. Privately." I looked at him after the boys had left and we were on our way to Sakura's place.

"Well, Moron-sensei, I'm flattered, I guess, but I-"

"What are you talking about?"

"I can't really accept this. I mean, you are my sensei, and all, I think this kinda thing could get you sent to jail, and-"

"Catie-"

"I'm real sorry, I'm sure you're a nice guy, but I just don't think of you like that-"

"Catie." His voice held a tone of authority, a tone I couldn't contest even if I wanted to. That was a voice I always have and always will obey, no matter the situation. And right now, that voice was telling me to shut up.

"Yes, Moron-sensei?"

"That's not why I wanted to talk to you alone." He rubbed his temples, and my eyes widened with false realization. I had known what he'd meant.

"Oh."

"No, I wanted to ask you some questions."

"Ask away."

-x-Kakashi POV-x-

"Well... What does your father do for a living?"

"... Hell if I know." She snorted derisively. "He could be dead, for all I know. For all I care." She seemed sort of... sad?

_No no no, Catie doesn't get upset. It must just be another form of anger._

"Alright, how about your mother?" That just seemed to make her angrier.

"Hey, how about we don't talk about my biological parents," Her voice was a lot quieter than it had been. "Please?" I watched her for a moment, then ruffled her hair.

"Okay, how about your adoptive parents?"

"Well, Mr. Fuji is Master Chief in the navy, and his wife is a housewife."

"I see. And what do you want to become when you grow up?"

"Tactical support for the military."

"No hesitation there."

"I've been thinking about it for a long time, myself."

"Okay..." _That took less time than I would have thought..._ "What about you? Tell me about yourself."

"Uh... Catherine Fuji, military prodigy, self-proclaimed best shot in my school, and... That's it."

"What's your favorite color?"

"Why?"

"Just answer the questions."

"Dark ones."

"What color is your hair?"

"Black."

"What color would you dye it, if you could?"

"I wouldn't."

"If you had to?"

"I'd bleach out all the color."

"O... Kay... What color are your eyes?"

"... Why does this matter?"

"I want to know all I can about you. It'll help me understand... Why you are the way you are."

"...Gold."

-x-Cate POV-x-

"I see."

"Oh, do you?"

"Have you ever had a boyfriend?"

"What the bleeding hell?" I snapped.

"Just answer the questions."

Since I felt I could trust him, and because no one else was around, I took in a deep breath. "... I was abandoned at birth and sent into an orphanage until I was six. I had no friends whatsoever. When I was six, I met Master Chief, who wasn't master chief at the time, and he took me home, no questions asked, because I was the quietest one there. It turns out his wife couldn't have kids because her parents had loaded her up on birth control, and she had a reaction in her ovarian tubes, which had to be cut out when she was twenty-three, the year after she met Master Chief. Anyway, I was raised by him when he was on leave, and by myself when he was away. His wife and I never really got along. She wanted me to be some perky blonde girl with twin curly pigtails and a penchent for wearing frilly dresses and bows and smiling, and I wanted her to let me be who I was."

"You've always been this... restrained?"

"If you want to put it like that, but no. I used to laugh a bit more, and I smiled all the time, when I was outside. Anyway, then I started school and made friends with a couple people, and then we moved to be closer to whatever port Master Chief was at. We did that a lot, and then he became Master Chief, and we stayed there. That's when I met Akira, and we've been friends ever since. We fight all the time, and constantly compete over stupid stuff, but I trust her with everything, stuff I don't even entirely trust with me, and I think she trusts me the same way."

"You think?"

-x-Kakashi POV-x-

"How the fuck would I know? I'm not her, and I can't just reach out and touch her thoughts and know them. No boyfriends, no girlfriends, no random kissing or touching, no displays of affection at all. I'm just me, and I'm only interested in fulfilling my dream."

"To save someone."

"Yeah, that too, although I think that one's down the drain."

"Why?"

"Because the person I want to save probably won't listen to me when I tell him to stay."

"Stay?" I was curious, and the saddened look vanished from her face as she rubbed the back of her head nervously.

"Eh heh heh, did I say stay? I meant to say, uh... GOTTA GO!" She ran off down the street and vanished into her house.

-x-Cate POV-x-

"That... Was... Too... Close..." I panted, leaning against the door. "Urgh... I can't believe I almost told him..." I put my head in my hands.

"Well well well, un." I froze, "An aborted confession of love? Seems like you don't really want him to know, un." I was a little surprised at how much terror that extra little grunt could instill. Fuckin' Deidara.

"What do you want, Dipwad?" I asked, looking up at the blond bomber.

"Now, now, is that anyway to talk to superiors, un?" He asked, crouching in front of me. He was ridiculously confident. We'll just have to change that, now, won't we?

"Okay, first of all, Dipwad," I said, holding one finger. "My name is Cate, not Un, so get it through your blond little head, mkay? Secondly," I held up another finger, "Don't speak to me as I'm an idiot, because in all reality, I'm probably more intelligent than you'll ever be, and lastly," I held up a third finger, "I have few superiors," I turned my hand around and held up only my middle finger, "Of which you are not a part."

"Hmph, you're pretty cheeky, un." He grinned maliciously. "Maybe you should see my art close up." I paused, sensing another opportunity to get on his nerves.

"What art?" He grinned and pulled out a lump of clay and put it in his palm, where it was quickly eaten by his hand-mouth and then spit back out. He molded the clay into a little clay bird.

"What's that supposed to be?" I asked glibly, and his smile faltered slightly.

"It's a bird, un, and soon it will be art."

"By the way, that whole hand-mouth-thing-that-eats-shit-then-throws-it-up is fucking disgusting." I told him. "And how will it be art? Are you going to fire the clay, or something?"

"In a manner of speaking, un. You see, little girl," Oh, the tic is back, "True art is revolutionary, it's incendiary, it's..." He made a handsign, and the bird exploded, destroying Sakura's house and setting fire to the surrounding area. As he carried me out to his stupid big flying canary, I noticed that Akira was already on it. Note that, for the record, the only reason I'm not kicking his ass right now is because I just got blown up and, while I'm seriously burned or scarred, I still can't move very well. "An explosion."

"Aw, hell." I said, rolling my eyes as he tied me and Kira-chan together.

"What, un?"

Kira-chan knew what I meant. She'd watched the anime with me. "You were supposed to say 'Art is a bang!' " He frowned.

"Girls are weird, un..." He mumbled, getting up on the bird and making it fly off.

I stared over the side and watched the area slowly fill with people. I noticed that we weren't very high, just high enough that we'd be kinda... broken... when we landed.

"Incidentally, Akira-chan, do you trust me?" I asked, looking up at the sky.

"Yeah."

"With both our lives?"

"Of course."

"Would you follow me into battle, even if death were certain?"

"I'd have to. Someone has to have your back, and I'm sure you could get us out of any situation at least mostly alive." She replied. My eyes watered a little. _Probably all the smoke..._ I told myself.

"What if we were to get captured and were a long way off the ground, and I wanted to jump?"

"I'd jump after you. You know what you're doing." She said.

"If you say so." I kicked the blond guy. "Hey, dude, we're off now, thanks for the ride."

"What're you- HEY, UN!" He watched us pitch ourselves off the back of the bird and fall to what he probably thought was our certain doom. Which... May have been correct...

I sat up rapidly with a gasp. A look around told me that Akira had just done the same, and I looked over at her.

"Did you just-"

"Yeah, I did, did you-"

"Yes, oh my lord..." I crossed myself, and felt someone jump onto my bed and hug me. "What the-?"

"OH GOD CATE YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I MISSED YOU AND THEY WERE GONNA PULL THE PLUG AND AND AND-"

"Calm down, Shinari-chan. I'm sure this all can be explained calmly and rationally." She sat up, and I flung the blankets off myself and rapidly got dressed in the clothes that Saiyuri threw at me, that she'd probably brought from my house. "As soon as I find Sam Minamino and kick his perverted ass from here to next week."

"Oh, hey, Catie, I-" I whirled around and punched Sam in the nose, probably breaking it, but hey, what the hell do I care?

"Do. NOT. Call. Me. Catie." I said.

"Uh, Cate... Your eye's twitching... And you've got a weird expression on your face." Saiyuri pointed out, while Shinari tried to calm me down.

"Only one person is allowed to call me Catie ever again, and it sure as hell ain't you." I snarled. "And the same goes for Cate-chan."

"Who are they?" Saiyuri asked, and I smiled at her.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." I told my twenty year old friend, and wondered, not for the first time in my life, how I'd become friends with a twenty year old.

"If you say so." I turned to say something to Akira, and my eyes widened, before I rushed to the window, looking for the blond-and-orange flash I'd just seen.

"Cate?"

"What's wrong, mom?" Shin-chan asked, coming over to stand next to me, and my eyes watered again, as I thought of my 'brother', who I hadn't gotten to say goodbye to.

"Er, nothing. I thought I saw something." I mumbled.

"You're crying." Kira-chan commented, and I scowled at her, then hit her on the head.

"I am not." I said, scrubbing my face.

~X~

bella- OH TEH NOES IS OVER?

cate- baka. you can write a sequel.

bella- OH YEA YAYZ DOES YOU GUYS WANTS A SEQUEL CUZ IF YOO DO THEN I'LL WRITE ONE! BUT YOO GOTZ TO TELLS MEH :-P

cate- ... baka-sensei...

bella- YES CATE?

cate- ... could u please turn off caps lock? my head hurts...

bella- ... SURE ENOU- sorry... sure enough, cate...

naruto- oh teh noes! Cate-chan, u left meh!

cate- i got kidnapped, 'member?

naruto- ... oh yea

kakashi- ... *hugs cate*

cate- *hugs back, strangely*

deidara- ... wat do u mean, i was 'supposed' to say ' Art is a bang', un '?

cate- i meant what i said

akira- so did i :-P

_**X-X-X-X-X-X-X i will not write a sequel if you do not review X-X-X-X-X-X-X**_

_**I expect at least... 32. thats only two reviews a chapter, so im sure you can manage.**_


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